The Telefile
<i>New Girl</i>: The Do’s and Don’ts of Thanksgiving Camping

Ever since Friends went off the air nearly a decade ago, there's been a noticeable absence of great Thanksgiving episodes on sitcoms. New Girl has clearly been trying to fill the void and while the first two efforts -- "Thanksgiving" (Season 1) and "Parents" (Season 2) -- were solid efforts, last night's "Thanksgiving III" proved that the third time isn't necessarily a charm. It probably didn't help matters much that this was a Thanksgiving episode with little to no Thanksgiving, but mostly it was because the mojo of Season 3 is still off. While Schmidt and Winston had some particularly hilarious moments, Coach still feels out of place and the over-analyzing of Jess and Nick's relationship reared its ugly head again. Here now are the do's and don'ts of going camping on Thanksgiving:

Do: Show Winston's pottery seminar
Schmidt may not have been psyched about it, but I really want to see it, dammit.

Don't: Have Coach and Schmidt still duking it out for Cece's affection
We can only watch Coach humiliate Schmidt so many times before it gets mean-spirited, right? In "Thanksgiving III" alone, Coach bested Schmidt at camping (he was so good at building a fire; Schmidt wondered if he was a sorcerer) and Schmidt got himself stuck under a rock. Just in case that wasn't enough, Schmidt surrendered and offered to help Coach woo Cece. I guess someone has to be less pathetic than Winston, right?

Do: Wear a Hidalgo-inspired hat like Schmidt while camping
It's just a really good look for camping. Much better than Winston's cat-themed long johns.

Don't: Forget to take the stickers off of fruits and veggies you bought that you're trying to pawn off as bounty
A frustrated Jess, Cece and Schmidt went into town to get real food for Thanksgiving "dinner." While Nick bought the whole avocados-and-radishes-growing-on-bushes ruse, he figured out what happened when there was a still a sticker on his apple.

Do: Stick it to Thanksgiving
As Schmidt put it, the pilgrims and Native Americans are the "first chapter in a proud history of cooperation" in this country.

Don't: Prove your masculinity by going on a doomed camping trip
Apparently spending too much time with his hyper-feminine girlfriend was making Nick less of a man (he was wearing her sweatpants and dreaming about horses, but still no reason to panic), so he got it in his head that instead of enjoying a normal, awesome, indoors Thanksgiving, he and his friends would go camping and hunt and pillage their own food. Of course, Nick's idea of hunting and pillaging was to bring 96 warm beers instead of actual food, building faulty bear traps and "catching" a long-dead fish. It was, as expected, a disaster that ended in Jess eating the fish to make him feel better and getting sick and disoriented and the both of them falling into his bear hole. Oh, and Jess wound up in the hospital with Legionnaires' Disease. The snacks-for-Thanksgiving thing in the hospital room was cute and all, but next year, just have a turkey, guys.

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