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Modern Family: All Dinner, No Show

by Angel Cohn January 23, 2014 10:38 am
<I>Modern Family</I>: All Dinner, No Show

After last week's pretty solid episode, I was kind of not dreading this one, but instead this "Three Dinners" offering was totally unpalatable and as excruciating as sitting through a dinner with Mitchell and Cam where they discuss Syria. Also, the whole episode was a total waste of some really talented guest stars.

Dinner 1 - Mitchell and Cam
The engaged couple decide to go out and have a dinner where they can't discuss Lily or their wedding… so they were forced to awkwardly stare at each other and make the waiter repeat the specials a bunch of times. I've had dtrinners like this, and they suck, but that doesn't make watching them on TV any more entertaining. Eventually, after they ran out of news from Cam's phone about Syria, they started gabbing with the couple seated really close to them (Eddie McClintock and Leslie Grossman), revealing way to much about their lives and oversharing (even with food). Until the guy decided he wanted to propose and she turned him down. The lesson here is that you DO NOT under any circumstances propose to Mary Cherry at a lame restaurant where the seats are too close together and dessert hasn't even been served. It all got more stupidly uncomfortable from there and just went on for far, far, far too long. We were desperately hoping there'd be a phone call from Lily or something to cut this dinner short.

Dinner 2 - Jay and Shorty
Jay's best friend Shorty (Chazz Palmenteri) and his wife Darlene (Jennifer Tilly) announced during dinner that they are moving to Costa Rica. I wholeheartedly approve of this and would happily watch a spin-off show about Shorty and Darlene living it up in the jungle, as I love both Palmenteri and Tilly and think they have a good dynamic together. Not that you could really see much of that here, as they just dropped the news and then Jay had a hissy fit and made it all about him (when he wasn't talking about Gloria and Manny's cuddling sessions). And then Manny had to throw his two cents into it, like he's some sort of mini-psych major all of a sudden, and then Jay and Shorty hugged it out. Dumb and pointless.

Dinner 3 - Phil, Claire and Haley
Phil and Claire were tired of Haley just laying around the house, barely making an effort at school and showing no initiative in life, so they tried to ply her with booze (though, isn't she only like 19 or 20?) at a restaurant to get her to come up with a life plan. And then she finally told them that she has a blog related to fashion (sounds a lot like the one that girl on Courtney Loves Dallas runs) and then ended up paying the bill and driving home when her parents got too drunk, showing us that she's the responsible one. Could we have skipped this nonsense and just seen her learning how to set up a blog (we presume Dylan or Alex were involved) and taking more selfies?

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