Tru Calling

Episode Report Card
Grade It Now!
Intolerable Cruelty

You know, I've actually seen better writing than this on the bathroom stalls at a monster truck rally. Also, this show can fucking bite me.

After Paige's father-related revelation, Tru goes back to see the registrar again. "I just need one more thing," she says, and then we cut straight to Tru arriving at Daddy's house, because there's no way even the writers on this steaming pile of dodo droppings could conceive of a scene dumb enough to actually show a school employee giving out a home address like that. The Guy Who Won't Be Important For Another Twenty Minutes gets a few additional seconds of screen time as Tru gets out of the cab, and then she bops right up to Daddy's front door and starts butting into his personal life, which obviously her only actual talent. Besides applying lip gloss, of course. To continue with our theme of characters telling Tru things they wouldn't even tell their priests or therapists, Daddy comes right out and admits that Paige thinks he molested her. He claims he didn't, and also says that all Paige remembers is something about "the moon and the stars." And you all should remember that as well, because if Paige already remembers that, then the whole Flatliners subplot is completely irrelevant, and Paige is obviously completely blind and also probably brain-damaged because the answers to all her questions have been fifteen feet away for her entire life and she completely failed to notice them. Now, I've spent the better part of the last five days trying to come up with witty and interesting variations on the whole "My God, this show sucks" theme, but I've already used pretty much all of them at this point, and sometimes it's best to just stick with the basics. So my God, people, this show sucks.

Cut to the MCATs. Tru isn't there. No one cares.

Cut to Tru. No one cares. But I'll tell you about it anyway, because I'm completely numb at this point, and the only thing that scares me more than the remaining seventeen minutes of this show is Sars when I'm late with a recap. Tru's back on campus now, talking to Harrison on her cell phone. He's all, "What are you wearing?" and she's like, "Where's your hand right now?" and that may be kind of disgusting, but it's still more interesting than listening to their fifty-third conversation of the hour about how she can't remember the names of the winning zzzzzzzzzzz. She's eventually accosted by Paige, which mercifully ends the phone call, but then Paige has to go and ruin things by referencing Single White Female and again consenting to reveal all her innermost secrets to SOMEONE SHE JUST MET THREE HOURS AGO. Tru cleverly uses the story of her mother DYING BEFORE HER TIME to convince Paige not to kill herself, which causes Paige to utter the following memorable bit of schlock: "I don't know why I trust you, but I do." But before I can truly take a moment to bask in the utter craposity of that line, Drue shows up with the real Jessica "Bitchy Girl" Hanson in tow, and Tru's cover is totally blown. Despite the fact that Tru has already followed her, stalked her, accused her of being a drug addict, interfered with her personal life, paid an unsolicited visit to her father, and just generally made a nuisance of herself for the entire time that they've known each other, it's this minor name-related revelation that finally convinces Paige not to trust her newest best gal-pal. Tru tries to explain, but Paige isn't having it. "As far as I'm concerned everything you've told me is a lie," she snipes. "I bet you're not even a real medical student, are you?" Ooh, burn! And so clever too, because Tru wants to be a medical student! That's just genius! GENIUS, I SAY!

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Tru Calling




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