The Voice
Season 6 – The Blind Auditions Continue

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: D+ | 10 USERS: A-
Almost Is Never Enough

In case you accidentally erased your whiteboard at home keeping track of the "score," Usher has nine artists, Shakira also has nine ("eclectic artists"), Blake has seven, and Adam is also at seven. They're getting tired of this shit, all of them. But at least there's only one more week of auditions, so we might get some good ones. And the judges will get out of their chairs even more, I fear.

The first person to audition in this round is Kat Perkins. She has a lot of tattoos and her background music is a royalty-free cool so she must be a rocker. Oh, but she grew up on the farm, and the music switches to country. Fortunately, our instincts were right and she's a rocker. She was in a band with her husband, who was the drummer, but they got divorced like right after they got famous. Now she's a nanny and that's why you don't even date a drummer. The kids she nannies says she's a cool nanny because "any time we turn music on she's the star." Bless you, Michael. Soon you will not think that's cool.

Her friends and family wait nervously in the viewing room and Carson repeats his go-to opener, "big breath!" Like he knows anything anymore. Kat chose "Gold Dust Woman" to sing and I like that it's not a typical audition choice and she clearly knows what she's doing with her voice. Adam and Shakira turn their chairs around the same time, and it's about time because Kat is pretty great. Usher turns his chair even though Kat will probably go with Adam. She might be the best singer we've heard so far, and I don't just mean of the night.

Usher compliments Kat on her slightly country sound and her control over some sustained notes. Shakira pitches herself as being a writer, producer, choreographer, etc. and it's a little "bless her heart." This belongs to Adam, and I think he knows it. He says she seared the entire audience with her final note and acknowledges the fact that it's a Fleetwood Mac song. We get it, Adam, it's one of your favorites. Kat pretends to be torn, but chooses Adam. I don't usually like when people pick Adam, but I think this is a good one. He picks her up and she koala hugs him; I wonder what he thought of that.

The next artist is Gabi Ramirez and he works at a generic "kitchen appliance store," which allows him to work on his music and play on the streets. Ugh. Before this, Gabi had an opportunity to play soccer but realized he'd rather sing and it wasn't easy to tell his dad. The stories are a little weak this season, but I much prefer that to all of the dead relatives and sadness for the sake of emotion.

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