Real World
This is the End… The End of the Beginning

Episode Report Card
Manimal: D | 1 USERS: A+
This is the End... The End of the Beginning

Previously: Heather and Eric got in a big fight, and Heather really managed to pierce Eric's glossy surface and hurt all two of his feelings. Andre and the "band" made a video.

It's the very last episode of the first season. Sniff.

Caption: The Last Four Days. There are also date/time captions but I'm too lazy to start recording those until the very end. Andre, musingly, says, "What does it mean to me after thirteen weeks?" Eric -- sporting a beret, Wilford Brimley's old glasses and of course, his shiny waxed chest under an open flannel shirt -- says, "I can't even begin to explain." I can tell you what it means to me, Eric, after thirteen episodes of you: it means bleeding eyeballs. I retract that earlier "Sniff." Becky says that it was a "constant mirror" and very intense when everything you do is "being reflected back at you." I wonder if she means, "Everyone you sleep with is then put on the show"?

Kevin tells us that one of the problems with "our generation" is that people are rarely honest with one another and themselves, and that one thing about the loft is he got to know people who are trying to be honest with themselves and others and be human beings. During this monologue there are shots of Kevin frolicking with Julie, and then with Eric, of all people. Okay, maybe in a general sense Eric gets classified as a human being, because he is a carbon-based biped who has the power of human speech, but what grade of crack was the editor smoking when he put him in these clips?

Andre says he got to meet six very interesting people. Cut to a shot of Norman telling everyone how dolphins not only sleep with their parents, but they are homosexual and they masturbate with mackerel. Haw! I love Norman. I'd like to commend the editors here for managing to achieve some humor -- with a little subtlety, even. Then Andre goes on to tell us how his Real World stint got exposure for the band.

Caption: Andre's Industry Showcase. Why No, They Can't Dance is playing. It's your standard three-chord complaint rock. The concert's in the loft. Norman and Julie are watching from a balcony above and bopping along.

Julie tells us that it's over and she has mixed emotions about it. She's glad, but at the same time she knows that it will never be this way again, and it's been such a huge part of everyone's life. Cut back to Andre singing, "Things will be different now..." I wish I had medical coverage for the anvils Bunim-Murray keeps dropping on my head.

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