Real World
The Asparagus Is Not Cooked

Episode Report Card
Pamie: F | Grade It Now!
Nothing Happens

Pedro explains again that he didn't have pneumonia. Alex is relieved and takes Pedro home. Pedro tells us he was tired, so he took a nap and then his sister came in. She takes his temperature and cries as he tells her that he's going to be fine. They hug. It's a remarkably touching moment in this otherwise boring show.

Pedro's with his family when he gets a phone call from Rachel, I think. She says that he needs to tell his family about Sean. He says he'll do it when he gets back. The girl bitches at him. I bet it's not Rachel. Why would she care enough about anyone else to call and find out how he's doing?

Pedro shows his family pictures of Sean, but he doesn't mention that he's engaged, nor that he's thinking of moving to San Francisco. Do you see the themes in this episode? There are only two and they are repeated seventeen times. Pedro says it's important for his family to be okay with his life. He says he's sad that he didn't tell his family, but that he feels caught between two worlds.

Pedro gets a phone call from Cory. She superficially coos that they were worried he'd never come back. He says that he got sick and went to the hospital because he thought he had pneumonia, but he didn't, so he's fine now. Why recap when the show recaps itself? Pedro says he's leaving for the airport right now.

And he does. God, I'm just going to tell a joke or something because there's nothing in this episode and if you made it all the way to this point in the recap, you must either really love The Real World, have been a cast member in this season, or be a great fan of mine. In any event, you've earned something. Okay, let me think. Dammit. I can't think of anything. This show has sapped me dry. for real. I can't think of a damn thing. I'm sorry. Pedro says he didn't want to leave his family, but he wanted to get to San Francisco, so he had "mixed emotions."

At the San Francisco airport, Judd, Rachel, and Cory wait for Pedro. Cory says that Pedro was getting chest pains. Rachel is pissed off that Pedro didn't tell her anything about the chest pains. Judd holds a sign that says "Pedro 'Boom Boom' Zamora." When will the comedy stop? I can't breathe!

The roommates drive home as Pedro says his visit was good. Rachel asks whether he told his family he was engaged. He says he didn't.

Pedro pouts around the house and says he needed to work out some issues with Cory. They sit, and Pedro tells her that she was putting all of her energy into Puck and none on him. Cory explains thus: "I just focus more on Puck than anybody else. Because I wanted to believe that he was a good person and I wanted to believe that he liked me." She says that she can't stop, and he just beats her down. Pedro puts on his judging cap and tells us, "Those are patterns of an abusive relationship." He tells us that Cory needs to learn how to be more aggressive. What a brilliant revelation! Cory says that she would have just kept taking it from Puck until she had to go into therapy and Weight Watchers. Pedro laughs and laughs, and Cory says she's totally serious. Fight resolved.

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Real World




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