Real World
Stephen and David Learn Lessons

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Kim: C- | Grade It Now!
Stephen and David Learn Lessons

David and Lindsay are lying on a bed somewhere. Apropos of nothing, David says that he has a friend who is spending his life in jail for "murder and armed robbery." Lindsay asks whether the friend murdered someone, and David replies that he didn't, but he got "pinched for it." David is like a character in a '40s detective novel or something. Who says that someone got "pinched"? David, that's who. ["People in GoodFellas did, too, and that mostly took place in the '60s and '70s. Maybe it's a mob thing." -- Wing Chun] In an interview, David says that his friend is spending his life in jail. For those of you who missed it the first time he said it, less than a minute ago. Lindsay asks whether David has other friends in jail, and David says that "mostly all of them" are. Lindsay asks how David has escaped that, and David says, "Grace of God." David is so Good Will Hunting that it hurts. He was Good Will Hunting before there was a Good Will Hunting. In an interview, David says, "That little turn that you take, and I could have took it [sic], and I was halfway around the turn, and for some reason, man, I just kept it straight." David shakes his head sadly, as if wondering how he turned out so freakin' awesome. Lindsay asks David what kind of trouble he got in, and David says he could probably get in trouble just for talking about it. Ooh, he's bad-ass.

Three shots of the city of Seattle and no Space Needle! A new record, I think. At the fish market, David catches a fish, and Rachel Dratch from Saturday Night Live yells out, "You're retaaahhhhhded." Okay, so it's really David's friend Shannon, who yells out, "Excuse me, Mr. Eurotrash!" David takes a break to talk to his friend from home. She brays at him that he stranded her at the airport. He gives her a big hug and asks if he smells. She tells him that he "smells like a pussy." Okay, despite Shannon's rough exterior, I like her. I can't help it.

Nighttime. Space Needle Shot #58. At the house, Stephen is talking to his mom on the phone, who says that she is "due any day." In an interview, Stephen says that when he found out his mom was pregnant, he was upset because "she didn't plan again." On the phone, Stephen asks his mom whether she's still going with the name "Sade," and she says that she is. In an interview, Stephen explains that his mom is forty-three years old, and at that age, "it's very, very hard for a woman to have a healthy baby." Be that as it may, I think his mom has survived in this world long enough to be able to take care of herself, and Stephen's attitude kind of bugs me.

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Real World




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