Real World
So Tired

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So Tired

Shavonda talks to Shaun on the phone again. He says that he understands what she's going through right now, but that he loved her, and this is unexpected. Shavonda apologizes without really meaning it, and says that he doesn't get that this whole thing is scary for her, because she's about to make a lifelong commitment to him. So now it's his fault that she's scared of commitment? And being so terrified of making a commitment to him that she has to go out and sleep with someone else? Might mean that she's not ready for that commitment. I'm just saying. And why would he take her back, in that case? Shavonda says that if Shaun can't understand why she's scared, then they're not meant to be together. I love how she turns this all around on him. Shavonda says that her hookup with Landon wasn't just an isolated incident, and that her feelings are changing and she's starting to enjoy being independent. Except for the part where she really just bounced from Shaun to Landon with no independent time. Shavonda says that she knows she'll be alone when she gets home, and that's the price she'll pay to figure out who she is. By sleeping with another guy. I totally get the whole "I've always been in relationships and I need to figure out who I am before I can be with someone else" thing. I do. But doesn't figuring out who you are alone require actually being single for a while? Because what Shavonda's doing looks a lot like someone who can't be alone for four months, so she had to find someone to cling to on a daily basis. Which is pretty much the opposite of what she's saying. Shavonda interviews that she believes that she was with Shaun for a reason (fear of being alone), and that she came to Philadelphia for a reason (fame-whoring).

Shavonda tells Sarah, "God put me in this situation for four months for some reasons. And maybe, God's saying, 'You need to be single right now because you might well have found the man of your dreams, but you need to, you know, play the field for a little while.'" We all know God doesn't do reality shows. And frankly, Shavonda is using divine intervention to avoid taking responsibility for her own decisions. That way, when Shaun won't take her back, she can blame God, or say that God didn't want them to be together, instead of admitting that maybe she treated Shaun like crap. Shavonda interviews that she needs to work on herself instead of being with someone else. Exactly. So do it!

Shavonda tells Sarah that Landon is lonely and she's lonely, and that they were drawn to each other in Fiji for comfort and affection. Shavonda says that she doesn't like to have sex with someone and then continue to be non-monogamous. She doesn't want to go to a nightclub, see Landon kissing another girl, and feel shitty. She also doesn't want it to be awkward when Landon brings a girl home, and have everyone looking at her and wondering what she's thinking about it. Maybe she should have thought about that before she hooked up with her roommate. Shavonda thinks that intimate relationships need to be monogamous, and that if Landon doesn't want that, they won't be intimate. Shavonda interviews that she's trying to protect herself. She then claims, "I don't play second fiddle, and I don't play games with boys." Keep that quote in mind.

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Real World

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