Real World
Janelle And Jose's Fight

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Jose Locates His Balls

House. Night. On the security cameras, Tyler watches the arrival of his friends from home. He's nervous and excited to have a "taste of home." They play a lame joke where they pretend to not know this "Tyler" of whom the friends speak. The friends enter. Hugs all around. Janelle hypothesizes that it must be nice for Tyler to have friends from home. Quelle passive-aggressive.

Night. Bars. The friends. Friends. John tells us that Tyler's friends are cool. Paula gets a kiss from Tyler. She tells us that she's refusing shots she's being offered. Aw. I like it when she goes walnuts. Tyler tells his friends about Paula's drinking problem/split personality, and a pudgy, red-faced guy asks Paula what "brings this on." Paula and Tyler babble and joke. Paula camera-scabs that the doctor doesn't want her to do any more shots, so she hasn't had one in two weeks. It's good that her roommates are proud of her. Yeah, they just don't want their cabinets getting kicked in. Laughter. Drinking.

Key West. Key West. House. House. Another stupid statue. Voices. Kitchen. The kids get into a food fight. Chocolate sauce and other stuff. Man, they are going to be grounded. John and Red Face wrestle like Ennis and Jack trying to keep warm in a tent. Oh no! The art world weeps as the friend kicks over Tyler's "Red God" masterpiece. John then grabs Janelle and throws her into the hot tub. Sadly, she does not drown.

Later. Tyler cleans. Paula says that John is an asshole but that she loves him. Tyler tries to scrub the impossible brown chocolate stains out of the rug. (I'm sure that's not that first time he's had to do that. Zing!) Tyler jokingly regrets inviting his friends over. Jose starts scrubbing and then yells at Paula for talking smack. Paula tells us that Jose's going off was weird, and that she thinks "that's the real Jose." Jose proudly camera-Polos that he's been passive so much lately, and that he's not going to "do that anymore." Jose yells at Paula, but clearly it's all in fun. For them, if not for us. Because, you know, not for us. Commercials.

Beach. Water. Driving. FORD! Zach and Tyler. Zach says he's worried about letting people down with the Grand Opening. Tyler says that he's aware of this fact, and that Zach has told him about thirty times. Heh. Dick. Tyler says that he need not be nervous, and that it'll be fine. Then he tells us that the opening will be "absurd" and "humorous." Sort of like Tyler himself.

Water. Key West. Houses. Street. Cars. Salon. SIDEKICK! Jose talks on the SIDEKICK! to a tech who tries to talk him through fixing the broken tanning booths. Heh. What a nonsense fucking business they're running. Jose tells us that he needs to step up. Whatever. The booths are back online. Jose then tells the crew about going to hotels the previous day and offering the "con-sea-airs" (him too!) free tans, some of whom refused the freebie. Janelle is pissed. She camera-brats that Jose stepped on her pedicured toes. Janelle finally speaks the looming truth: "There's a potential for Mystic Tan to be a failure." That should be what's printed on their stupid t-shirts.

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Real World

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