Real World
And Take Beth With You!

Episode Report Card
Jessica: D | 412 USERS: A+
And Take Beth With You!

Last week: David was bad. This week: the aftermath.

We pick up right where we left off, almost: The three girls are downstairs at the kitchen table, having just told Jon, Aaron and Dom that they want David to leave the house. Aaron has ambled upstairs, presumably to ask David to join them, but David leans over the stairway railing and demands a private audience with Tami. All the girls just stare at the table and ignore him. David asks Beth if he can speak to her alone. Almost imperceptibly, Beth shakes her head. David grunts, throws his hands in the air, and stalks off. Aaron turns away in disgust as David, having thought of a smarmy comeback in the hallway, saunters back to ask the girls why they're treating him like "Freddy Krueger or something." Beth suggests he join them downstairs. He refuses. Beth snits that they won't talk to him unless he comes downstairs. David then asks Irene to talk to him, and she doesn't even look at him, just shakes her head and stares at the junk mail on the table. Hey, a sale on Kool-Aid! Excellent!

Tami, in an interview, explains that she didn't want to be alone with David because she was afraid that he would "influence her decision." Also, she was afraid that he might be packing heat; the Dippity-Do has mysteriously gone missing, and she thinks he's pinched it in case the Great Toiletry War of '93 reignites.

Back in the house, Aaron starts banging his head against the wall, and wonders for the twelfth time that day why he didn't stay in the Lamba Chi house where he belongs, dirty bathrooms and roofie sandwiches be damned! David informs the girls that he wanted to talk to them without the cameras (as if!), but because that wasn't possible, he'd like to talk to them alone, and now that he's been denied that, he "looks like the asshole." All the girls stare at the apparently hypnotic kitchen table, each of them thinking, "That's because you are the asshole, asshole." Irene shakes her head. "You are," she says, oh so wearily. David angrily asks whether she has to resort to name-calling. Irene places her hand over her eyes and repeats herself: "You are the asshole, David." Ever subtle, B/M Productions cue the opening notes of Metallica's "Unforgiven," as David turns on his heel and stalks up the stairs. See, because they're not forgiving him, get it? Get it? Do you get it?

The girls rise as a group from the table, and climb up the stairs to their room, all in one solemn, seemingly synchronized, sanctimonious line. Tami is wearing a pin-striped suit with her Newsies cap. Irene is wearing a vest. They make my eyes all hurty. Each girl stomps silently past David, who is sitting on the bottom step of the second landing. Irene gives Jon a dirty look for no apparent reason as she passes him.

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Real World




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