Real World - Road Rules Challenge
The Finale

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Drunken Bee: B | Grade It Now!
The Finale

It's been the best of times (CT punching a cactus), it's been the worst of times (uh, everything else). We open back in the controversial Rookie nomination process where Frank wants his team to vote CT into the Gauntlet, but his team wants to vote Adam in. Heh. "Nomination process." The Rookies go ahead and vote Adam in, and he refuses to say anything stupid in response, just commenting in an interview that he guesses he sort of deserves it since he was trying to make deals. Adam is so ridiculously sincere. He's all soft and vulnerable, kind of like a molted crustacean.

Speaking of crustaceans, Evan's lobster-red face comes on screen to interview about who the Veterans are going to vote in to go against Adam. Evan, it's called Banana Boat and no, it doesn't have anything to do with STD protection. Evan interviews that all the Veterans are thinking the same thing. And that is: "Oooh! Shiny!" No, actually, he says they are all thinking about sending Danny in because of the shady deal he tried to make with the Rookies. The Vet boys are all holding their tongues and Evelyn interviews that she'd rather go in the Gauntlet herself and take Adam on than have to sit around witnessing these boys being such pansies about it. God, Evelyn, why do you have to be so scary? After a few people mention Danny's name, he gets up and solemnly declares that he'll save them the trouble of more voting and just go in. He appears to believe he deserves a slow clap for this gesture. Then he interviews that his team are cowards.

Danny and Adam approach the Wheel of Destiny, which TJ spins and which once again lands on Ball Brawl like it has every single time before. Eric doesn't care about how rigged this stupid game is, but instead interviews, flashing lots of signs with his hands while he says things like "Let's get it on, fellas." Eric, I have an idea: how 'bout we get on with you dying?

TJ explains the rules, and then Adam interviews that this right here is what he lives for. Someone introduce this guy to a Bloomin' Onion or something. This is what he lives for? Danny interviews something about ripping Adam's arms off. Okay. TJ blows the airhorn and the boys take off. Adam gets to the first ball first, but Danny grabs him and slams him to the ground.

Commercial. We come back and get to watch Danny slam Adam down again because this show loves nothing more than deranged bullies beating up on sweethearts. Cut to Danny interviewing about how he can "benchpress two of these kids." A claim that does nothing to explain the fact that Adam basically just drags Danny along behind him to the finish line to get the first point. Frank is impressed. The airhorn blows again and Adam hauls ass to the next ball and quickly outmaneuvers Danny. It's becoming clear that Adam is definitely the better athlete than the angry short man. For the third ball, Adam wants to save his energy and let Danny take the point, but Danny is not only a shitty competitor, he's also just a cranky mofo. So Adam just walks to the ball and grabs it. On the last ball, Adam outruns Danny again and after a little bit of wrestling, makes it to the finish line and wins.

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Real World - Road Rules Challenge




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