Lone Gunmen

The Cap'n Toby Show - Okay, so everyone knows The Lone Gunmen IS CANCELLED and is NEVER COMING BACK, right? Blame the time slot, blame low ratings, blame the networks for not giving the show a chance, but let's get real. Is TLG great...

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Nerds: The Greatest Brains on Television

Nerds: The Greatest Brains on Television

Most shows have 'em, most heroes need 'em. They're nerds, glorious nerds.

RECAPS, WEECAPS, AND MORE

Latest Episode

1-13
Recap

The Cap'n Toby Show

The Cap'n Toby Show - Langly's beloved childhood TV hero is a spy, working for the Chinese government. TV, you were Langly's bestest friend growing up! How could you do that! Is nothing sacred? And when are hot dogs and doughnuts more than just hot dogs and doughnuts? Not in this episode.

05.31.2001 D+

Alex Richmond

Ep.

Title

Air/Pub'l

Grade

Author

1-12
Recap

All About Yves, Again

All About Yves - The LGs think that Yves is part of a rogue government team of assassins, and she could be. What is the mystery of Yves? What about her obsession with anagrams? What about her catsuits? If this is the season finale, shouldn't we find out? We should -- but we don't.

05.10.2001
05.12.2001
B+

Alex Richmond

1-11
Recap

The Lying Game

The Lying Game - Yeah, the title is a pun on the movie. But this episode is really about murder, mistaken identity, and a little gender bending. Not like the movie at all! Well, okay, it is like the movie. But only in some ways, not all! Like, there was no annoying tow-headed dimwit making football analogies in the movie. There you have it.

05.03.2001
05.05.2001
C+

Alex Richmond

1-10
Recap

Tango De Los Pistoleros

Tango De Los Pistoleros - In a nice twist, the LGs set out to trip up Yves and screw her up, instead of the other way around we usually see. It's a reversal of their usual dance -- which, like the tango, isn't of love, but of loneliness. Oh, just read the freaking recap. Read it madly, desperately. Read it like Frohike dances.

04.26.2001
04.27.2001
B+

Alex Richmond

1-9
Recap

Grin and Bear It. (Sorry.)

Diagnosis: Jimmy - The xylophones go off this week as the wacky hijinks ensue. Jimmy takes a dive while skiing, and gets amnesia, during which he acts no different than he usually does. A poacher of grizzly bears raises the ire of Byers, who loved Gentle Ben as a kid, and can't stand to think of harm befalling any of those big growly creatures. Aw. Meanwhile, Jimmy's laid up in the hospital and thinks he can bust a "doctor of death" who kills his patents. But Jimmy has his eye on the wrong guy; the evil guy is the one that's clearly evil from the beginning. The mole on his face is a dead giveaway. Duh.

04.19.2001
04.22.2001
C+

Alex Richmond

1-8
Recap

It's a Hard Knock Life

Maximum Byers - Not really.

04.12.2001
04.15.2001
B-

Alex Richmond

1-7
Recap

Planet Of The Frohikes: A Short History Of My Demeaning Captivity

Planet Of The Frohikes: A Short History Of My Demeaning Captivity - You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell! No really, this episode is not at all like a rant out of Charlton Heston's mouth. It's kind of sweet, if you believe in love. Monkey love, that is. Get your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape! Unless it's looove.

04.05.2001
04.08.2001
N/A

Alex Richmond

1-6
Recap

Madam, I'm Adam

Madam, I'm Adam - This week, in a very special X-Files-esque episode of The Lone Gunmen, a man comes to our three gun-dudes (and the giant hambone Jimmy, and the walking ad for leather pants, Yves) with a story about alien abduction and government cover-up. And there's midget wrestling. The mystery there is why you can't see midget wrestling on TV anymore. I mean, really.

03.29.2001
04.01.2001
C+

Alex Richmond

1-5
Recap

It's the Babies, Stupid

Three Men And A Smoking Diaper - Nothing's cuter than babies, right? In this episode of The Lone Gunmen, we learn that a googly, gurgling, diaper-destroying machine has the power to make a dead woman disappear. But that tiny detail isn't the only offensive thing the writers try to pass off as entertainment. There's also a saxophone solo.

03.22.2001
03.26.2001
N/A

Alex Richmond

1-4
Recap

Like Water for Octane

Like Water for Octane - There's the car. It runs on water. Big Business wants it. So do the Gunmen. Catfight!

03.17.2001
03.22.2001
B-

Jessica

1-3
Recap

Nazi. Geshundheit.

Eine Kleine Frohike - A Nazi poisoner runs rampant in New Jersey! Well, actually, she lives alone, with her maid. She did commit war crimes though, just under sixty years ago. Frohike tries to pass as her long-lost son to ID her and send her to jail for her crimes. And write a story on it, because America is still full of hate for those Nazis. Just tell it to IBM, why don't you.

03.15.2001
03.20.2001
B-

Alex Richmond

1-2
Recap

Frohike knows Kung Fu

Bond, Jimmy Bond - This week our three lone dudes track the trail of blood left by one of their own (a hacker, I mean), and Langly tries to sell out. Sadly, there's no way to do that without pushing up dirt, in their world.

03.10.2001
03.13.2001
C+

Alex Richmond

1-1
Recap

The First One

Pilot - Okay, it's a spin-off, but none of those losers from Chris Carter's other show appear -- not this week, anyway. This week, we really get to know our three newspaper geeks, get a tiny taste of Yves -- the lady hacker who's bad and hot -- and there's a conspiracy plot, and lots of pratfalls, too.

03.03.2001
03.05.2001
B-

Alex Richmond

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