The Blacklist
The Cyprus Agency

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 48 USERS: A-
Buying Young
Meera: "Thank you, sir."
Cooper: "Because it's your ass if she doesn't."


Aram: "Okay, Ted Caldwell's computer was very boring. But there was one thing that wasn't so boring."
Ressler, hilariously and oddly: "PURCHASE ORDERS? What would an attorney want with PURCHASE ORDERS? What does a lawyer need to purchase?"
Aram: "They aren't for office supplies. They are for ladies. I printed this dossier out of a cute and very smart Irish lass named Charlotte Patterson who is about to be abducted. See, the profile is about how super she is, and also her Virginia license plate."

The POs run around getting ready to find her, but guess who is already there ahead of them, looking frisky and ready to abduct? Six Shooter McGee, fastest kidnapper in the West. He is driving the biggest, scariest, bind-torture-killiest rape van of all time.


Charlotte: "See you co-eds later! I have to go to Chem class, unless I get kidnapped. In which case, hope I see you guys later."
She Is: Immediately kidnapped
The PO Is: Still tracking her car, lol

Grid control! Van Man backs hard into Ressler, knocking him down and bruising little but his pride, and then zooms away. Ladies and gentlemen, your country's Bureau of Investigation. Liz runs around yelling words into her walkie-talkie, but Van Man is long gone. Oh, Charlotte. It is your time management skills that screwed you this time. If you'd only been a little later to Chem class, everybody would have arrived at the same time. Cooper wouldn't be impressed with your lack of punctuality, to be sure, but at least you would not be in a van now.


Mallory: "Um, what are you doing here? Why did you call me at the office? Why did you text me 9-1-1 and then an emoji of a pregnant girl and then an emoji of a kidnapping?"
Moustachio: "Because you wouldn't pick up your cell phone!"
Mallory: "We went dark, Perry. The cell is retired. That's what that means. I swear it's like you can't find a good breeding trafficker anywhere!"
Moustachio: "You should work on your HR and workflow process. I was not informed about all this."
Mallory: "Why are you out making pickups of girls? We went dark, I said!"
Moustachio: "New orders, yeah. But this was old business, we lost one the other day and the lawyer said to get a replacement so I got the dossier and I drove my van to..."

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The Blacklist




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