Shear Madness

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
Evil. Fat. Lady.

Last week: Trump asked everyone to make the Trump Hotel Collection look amazing, but no one did. Luckily for the men, they're better performers so John Rich won it on his team's pitch. Star was solely responsible for her team's loss, but Trump let the women gang up and send La Toya home. In the suite, everyone's talking about how long the boardroom is taking. John Rich says there's no drama left on Backbone, but there's still a bunch of it on the women's team with Star and NeNe. Everyone thinks NeNe's going home, but in walk NeNe and Star. They tell everyone how tough it was. NeNe says that after what Star did to La Toya in the boardroom, she really wants to stay and kick Star's ass. She says she has to figure out how she's going to fuck Star up, because she totally is. Okay, I can't wait for this! "Money, money, money."

John Rich finds St. Jude kid Colin painting, and it's awfully cute. Then he hands the check over to St. Jude, making it almost $650,000 he's given them so far this season.

The teams are lined up waiting when Trump & Co. pull up in a limo. Trump tells them they all, as celebrities, know how important it is to look good, especially when it comes to hair. He says he's been made fun of for his, but he doesn't think it's so bad. Anyway, he introduces us to Farouk, head of Farouk Systems, which makes BioSilk and CHI. Farouk says the task is to produce a hair show, using BioSilk and CHI. They'll have to introduce the show to Farouk and an audience of hair stylists and educators. Farouk will judge them on brand messaging, showcasing the company's tools, and overall presentation. Trump says Ivanka and Eric will be his advisers, so who's going to project manage. Lil Jon acknowledges his dreads, but says he doesn't know much about hair and neither does Meat Loaf. So they roshambo for it. Lil Jon ends up as the project manager.

When Trump asks the ladies, NeNe pointedly tells him that Star told her she should be the project manager. Trump says that's very generous... of Star. He chuckles a little, and Star makes a "Who? Me?!" face. NeNe turns to Star and says she knows it's strategic on Star's part, but oh well. Trump asks if Star's intentions are good, and NeNe says they're bad -- that Star's trying to throw her under the bus. "But it's all good. It's going. Down." NeNe interviews that Star chooses the project manager every time, and she wonders who died and put Star in charge. Star tells Trump she's sorry NeNe thought her intentions were negative. She says that everyone here has won money for her charity and she thought it would be NeNe's opportunity. NeNe looks down at Star -- which is the best part of all of this. NeNe towers over Star, which has to make even someone that arrogant feel a little bit small. NeNe tells Star she didn't say that, or even think that. NeNe knows how Star thinks, and how she plays the game. Star steps away and tells NeNe this isn't The Real Housewives. She moves to the other end of the team, leaving Hope and Marlee between them. NeNe says she will take Star down, while the rest of these girls are afraid of Star. NeNe: "You pressed the last button in me, Miss Star Jones, and I will do you when the rest of these girls will not." Then, gesturing at Hope: "This is your puppet. And I am not." Star: "Wow." NeNe, snarky: "Wow." Trump, amused: "Wow." NeNe says she'd actually like to move down by Star and walks to the other end of her team's lineup. Star tells NeNe that was very unnecessary. Trump asks when this started, and NeNe says it's been happening since the beginning and everyone's let her do it, but NeNe's not taking it anymore. She tells Star she hopes she brought her street game, because that's what NeNe's playing. "Now, where's Barbara Walters?"

Trump tells the men they're a boring group of people right now. Then he reminds them all that someone will be fired on the losing team. Star interviews that this isn't The Real Housewives, and she was determined to show America the difference between an educated black woman under stress and someone who's uneducated. NeNe continues to yell at Star after they leave the lineup, and Star plays dumb: "Can you at least tell me what you're talking about, and accusing me of, or are you just going to scream?" NeNe walks away, muttering, "Punk ass bitch." And that's only the first thirteen minutes, y'all. Let's hope it can stay this full of drama.

In the Backbone van, the guys discuss ASAP. They think NeNe's lost Hope and Star with what she just did, and NeNe's probably so mad she can't think straight. Cut to ASAP's van. Total silence.

Backbone makes it back to their war room, where they watch some hair shows (where stylists do hair live on stage) on YouTube. Lil Jon thinks they'll stand out based on their theme, fashion, and celebrities. Lil Jon says this is Celebrity Apprentice, and they need to bring in celebrities. John Rich decides they should call Niki Taylor, which will look like a major power play to Trump, bringing in a former ASAP team member. Rich calls her, and she's in. She wonders why the girls didn't call her, though. Rich tells her she wouldn't want to be in the same room with them. "NeNe almost pulled Star's head off and used it as a doorstop this morning."

ASAP. NeNe says they have to let the drama go and get through this day. She interviews that it's weird to sit down with these women and work now, but she's working for Women Against Domestic Abuse (I can't find any such charity, so sorry there's not a link), so she'll do it. She tells the team that there are a bunch of hair shows in Atlanta. Hope's turned off by NeNe, and Star is too, but she's willing to work. They come up with the idea to shake their hair around, and a theme, "Shake Your Beauty." They all shake and dance around, and Marlee interviews that things eventually lightened up.

Farouk visits both teams and tells them about his products. It's important for him that people be safe, be beautiful, and buy American. He told NeNe he's totally cool with her doing something over-the-top. He likes to be surprised. Meanwhile, La Toya pays a visit to Trump in his office. She tells him how thrown off she was by being fired on no grounds at all. He says she also had laryngitis, which gave her a disadvantage. Trump asks who her biggest problem was, and she says Star, who was out to get her from the beginning. Trump asks what she wants, and she asks to come back and play on the guys' team, to prove herself. Trump tells her the answer's not "no" yet, but he'll decide in the next twenty-four hours. As La Toya leaves, Trump compliments her sparkly pants. That's right, folks. This man wants to be our president.

Backbone. Lil Jon tells his team to think themes. They remember that Farouk emphasized "Buy American," so Meat Loaf starts suggesting things like Marie Antoinette and ancient Rome and the Village People. I think Meat Loaf seemed a lot more lucid with Busey around for comparison. Lil Jon decides to show people from different places in America, like a country cowgirl, a Mardi Gras chick, etc. While Meat Loaf is in the toilet, the Jo(h)ns decide on "Feeling Good in America."

NeNe asks Star to get her some dancers or something for the hair show. Star interviews there's a bad Star on her shoulder telling her to let NeNe sink, but she has a job to do so she can't do that. She gets eight to ten girls for her. NeNe wants the team to get their hair done, too. Hope interviews that she's really sick of being the model, but it's NeNe's task and she'll have to do what she says, because she's totally evil. They head to

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