Lightning Strikes Mr. Hang Brain

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: D+ | 1 USERS: B
Modern Art, in 3D

This show is really going to run out of material for episode titles once Gary Busey gets fired. In honor of Easter or The Voice, this episode of Celebrity Apprentice is only an hour, which it should be every week. So, we are thankfully spared the 45+ minutes of hemming and hawing in the boardroom. Someone might get fired in the first ten minutes, I don't know. I could nominate about four or five celebrities to fire in the first ten minutes. But Omarosa wouldn't be on that list, because I, too, fear Omarosa in the boardroom.

"They are scared of my boardroom reputation," Omarosa notes in an interview, dressed in what looks like a cross between Jackie O's famous pink suit and Aretha Franklin's Inauguration Day bow hat. That is a power suit. Dennis Rodman isn't scared of her, though, and now that he has been brought back to the boardroom at every available opportunity, it's personal.

Which celebrity will be the first member of the Season 2 cast of Splash? Piers Morgan and the ugliest Trump son are here to help Donald Trump decide. Donald gathers the celebrities in front of the Trump Tower globe, which he commissioned. Then, Donald Trump explains in no uncertain terms, that paintings are 2D art, and sculptures are 3D art. Those are the two types of art. The celebrities will be selling the latter form.

Each team will form a gallery and sell art that they make to anyone with deep pockets and a need for charity tax write-offs in their future.

Team Power is down a member, and they ask Donald if they can have Trace Adkins. Donald accepts it as his idea first, and sends a reluctant Trace to Omarosa's plagued team. Lil Jon volunteers to be the Project Manager for Team Power, while Plan B nominates Lisa Rinna.

The teams hit the art store to make celebrity "art." Trace is audibly upset with the team change, asking an art store associate to shoot him, and picking up three packs of acrylic paint in one handful and calling it a day. Trace is fading fast.

Plan B sits down to plan who to call for big donors. Lisa Rinna is unsure about acting as Project Manager, since she's uncomfortable leading a fundraising task. Lisa Rinna's friends aren't rich. Just to be clear, though, even Lisa's poorest friends have more money than I do. Discussing their donor strategy, Stephen Baldwin is confused at Penn's postulation that the art doesn't matter. It's a fundraising task, but Stephen says, "specific to me, the art does matter."

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