Let's Get Physical

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B+ | 2 USERS: A-
Lesson One: Don't Make People Hate You
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Donald explains, in his usual outdoor voice, how the new group of Apprentices comes from all over the nation, and they all have a story to tell. One story he avoids is how he hand-picked the entire squad, which is why they're almost all jaw-droppingly beautiful. Their CVs, however, tell the usual shockingly successful stories, which I always find inspiring. I love reading about how people had $150 million portfolios by the time they were in junior high. It makes me feel -- not accomplished exactly, but -- like I could be. Which is the whole point of this show: watching highly successful people doing great stuff you can learn from, and then horribly stupid things you can feel superior about.

We focus first on Kristi, a 24-year-old sales genius from Gainesville, FL. She talks about her early challenges, including having a premature child at the age of 16, right up front. We move to the somewhat creepy Mark, a "good old boy from the South," who feels that he will be a strong competitor. Thirty-five, he's a wealth management startup success with the goal of managing $100 million in the next five years. He loves country music and describes his style as "visionary" and is a total sexist, having said previously that he'd get along with Carolyn once she realized she wasn't in charge.

Markus, 41, looks like British television. He grew up "splitting his time between Chicago and Sarasota, FL," but has lived in many wonderful cities. He left pre-law at Santa Monica College due to his "entrepreneurial spirit." In short, he is a tool. He immediately starts in with some irritating talk about how he's a "big fish in a small pond" and it's "time to put himself among the real players" because he's "not only as good as them, but better."

Quick Quiz! Here are some quotes from Markus's NBC interview. Check one for every sentence you'd ever possibly say in your lifetime:

"I have an intense passion for life and adventure."
"High on the list are skiing, auto racing, flying and a passion for fine wine: I frequently travel to Bordeaux, Champagne and Paris."
"Finding fascination in the everyday is a definition of success."
"The relationships I develop and the incredible adventures I lived are success."
"As a leader I take others where they would not go by themselves."
"My adaptable approach, vision and forward-looking decisions are hallmarks of my style."
"Bill Rancic and I are kindred sprits."
"We both appreciate a fine cigar!"

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