Amazing Race
You Look Ridiculous

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C+ | 3 USERS: A
Double your "pleasure," double your zzzzz…

The Bransens get to the airport and immediately head for Taca, which is the same airline the Paolos went to look at. The Weavers are right behind. Rebecca starts idiotically repeating, "The Cleavers! The Cleavers!" in reference to the Paolos while prancing through the airport in the most socially unaware, graceless way you can imagine. It's the kind of thing that basically causes people to stare at you because it's so obvious that you just have no idea how to behave in public. Ultimately, the Paolos book a flight to Phoenix via New York, and the Bransens and Weavers follow them onto the same flight. The twist is that in fact, they're scheduled to land ten or fifteen minutes ahead of the Linzes' Atlanta route. As the Paolos gripe about the Weavers getting on their flight, DJ makes some reference to "Don't mess with a good thing," and Brian tries to tease him by saying, "Then we should mess with you, 'cause you're a bad thing." When DJ completely fails to respond, but just kind of twitches angrily, Brian immediately backpedals with, "I'm kidding, I'm sorry, just...bad humor." A lot of people thought that was creepy, like Brian was scared of him, but it just read to me like knowing DJ is a total weirdo and you sometimes have to pacify him to keep him from being bitchy all day. More like, "Okaaaaay, never mind, there, big guy, guess you're not through brooding and seething" than like Brian was quaking in his shoes or anything.

In last place, the Godlewskis finally finish painting and leave for the airport to fly to Phoenix. I suspect their wheels looked the prettiest.

Meanwhile, at the airport, the Weavers confront DJ Paolo by backing him against a wall and surrounding him. Nice. "What was the reason for Yielding us?" they demand to know. Okay. First, he doesn't have to explain his game strategy to you if he doesn't want to. Second, you have acted like total assholes to the point where you have openly admitted that you know no one likes you -- and you have claimed not to care. Third, if you don't understand strategy well enough to understand why the last-place team should be Yielded, you need to think about strategy a little more carefully, because if your goal is to keep yourself out of last place -- rather than trying to win the leg -- the last-place team is the only team it makes any sense to Yield. You could come up with theories about trying to knock out strong teams, but if you want to protect yourself from elimination in a particular leg, which is by far the safest use of a Yield, you Yield the last-place team. It's the only thing that makes sense. DJ, for whatever his other flaws are, understands this first-grade-level strategy issue, and says simply, "You guys were the last team there, period." "We were already in sixth place!" some Weaver gripes, clearly not understanding that the goal of the leg is not winning the leg. It is not coming in last.

DJ tries to explain this to them, that the fact that they were in last is the point of Yielding them: "That's -- because it -- definitively trying to knock a team out." Which is exactly correct. You definitively knock a team out, meaning that the team getting knocked out won't be you. You make sure someone else is so far behind that they can't recover. That's your protection against elimination. What part of this isn't completely fucking obvious? Of course, the Weavers literally gasp with shock at how horrible talk of "knocking a team out" is in a game in which the only way to win is to knock all the other teams out. "DJ!" Mama Weaver says with shock, as if he had just confessed to a mild penchant for baby-eating. Mama Weaver: "We like you; we've been nothing but friendly to you." Nothing but friendly? "Let's be friends," she says. DJ civilly agrees that they can "be friendly," but he maintains that it's coming down to the end, and ultimately, it's a game. "Well, you don't have any Yields left, and we do, sweets," Mama Weaver bitterly says with a grim, ice-cold expression.

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Amazing Race




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