Amazing Race
Why Did You Have To Take Your Pants Off?!, Part II

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Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
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Shut up and Singapore

Bald Snark arrives at the airport to find it closed. Asshat follows, with Ian still bitching in a voice-over about how they've been "underestimated." Of course, his previous theory was that they were a target because all the other teams feared them. You'd think Ian could at least pick one self-aggrandizing theory and stick with it. Heavily edited snippets from Flo and Zach allegedly illustrate his point, however, as Zach voices over that he "tend[s] to forget about Teri and Ian," and Flo says she's "sure they haven't figured out where the hell they're going." Context for either statement? Oh, no. There's none. At any rate, Ian sounds out the whole "jet of water" thing as they look at the great big fountain. "Jet water, I got it," he says craftily. They grab the clue.

Jill and John Vito are rolling their luggage in front of them on a cart, apparently toward the hotel to which they were previously directed. They're on the airport road, though, which is sort of funny. Just walking along the middle of the road, steering the luggage cart. The only thing that would have made it better would have been horn noises. "Beep beep!" Or crash noises, of course. Crash noises are always in order.

Asshat and FloZach run into each other at the fountain as Asshat is leaving and FloZach is arriving. Asshat is working on finding out what country the flag belongs to, and they soon find themselves into a conversation with The World's Driest Individual. It's rather ironic, meeting the WDI at a 450-foot water attraction, but there you go. Fortunately for Asshat, he's up on his geography. They show him the flag. "Malaysia," says the WDI dryly. And then, even more dryly, "You are on the wrong continent." Ha! That was funny. I love the WDI. I say we keep him for the rest of the trip, and we start by introducing him to Flo. Asshat takes off, thoroughly put in their place. Hee.

FloZach pulls the towers clue, and they are the first team to actually recognize the name of the Petronas Towers and know immediately that the destination is in Malaysia. So one point for FloZach. You can imagine the high-fives in the Vassar alumni office at the realization that they've come up with something Flo and Zach actually know. They manage to say "Kuala Lumpur" three times before they're even in the cab, but they're off at last. They seem irrationally exuberant about the Petronas Towers to me. Maybe he's just happy that she's carrying her own backpack.

At what I suppose is the Geneva Airport Ramada, Jill and John Vito ask a guy whether he knows what country the flag they're holding comes from. He finally gives up the information that it's Malaysia, and they're off. John Vito voices over that it's 4:00 AM, and the airport opens at 5:00 AM, so they head back.

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Amazing Race

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