Amazing Race
Why Did You Have To Take Your Pants Off?!, Part I

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Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
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Everything Flo's downhill from here

Back at the cheese challenge, Jill takes another piece of cheese and threatens to throw up again. ["I love cheese more than almost any other food, but even I found the cheese chunks a bit daunting, because of the size of said chunks. Cubing the cheese a bit smaller might have made it a little less sick-making. Aaaand that concludes this week's installment of 'Sars Overthinks The Show.'" -- Sars]

Derek and Drew find their way to the car train. Asshat is following. Ken and Gerard are arriving as well. Nerd Lust meets up, and as they check the map and the clue again and talk about what they'll do when they get there, Flo notes the arrival of the Bald Snark and Asshat. Asshat gets out of the car, and as everyone stands around, they wind up chatting with some guys who tell them that the red bridge they're seeking in the adventure park is used for bungee jumping. Teri does not consider this good news, and she actually turns around and voluntarily puts her head on Ian's shoulder. Well, it's nice to know that once every fifty years they act like they don't hate each other. The Bald Snark approaches, and Asshat tells them about the upcoming bungee jump. "Go tell Flo," Teri says with disgust. Ian goes off in search of FloZach. When he finds them, Ian says, "Did you find out what we do at the red bridge yet?" You will not be shocked to hear that the way he says it is very, very snotty. "It's bungee, baby." Flo looks at him with hatred (or so it is implied) as we go to pre-break Slo-Flo-Cam.

Commercials. Something about Britney Spears in an animated Christmas special makes me want to put more clothes on. That is all.

Cheesefest. JVJ are continuing to eat. "Hurry up," she urges. Suddenly, the music launches into an energetic yodel that reminds me of the music from the "Mountain Climber" game on The Price Is Right. The melody is different, however. If you were here, I would gladly yodel the original for your enjoyment. Of course, all I really remember about that game other than the music is that, at least in 1990 dollars (when I watched TPIR in college), you could never go wrong in Mountain Climber by guessing $15, $25, and $35. Not that this is really about that. At any rate, JVJ do eventually locate the clue, so now they just have to finish uncovering it. When they do, Jill threatens to throw up one last time, and then they run back out to their car, probably about to encounter quite a bit of digestive upset. Phil explains that they can proceed directly to the pit stop, which is a steamship on Lake Geneva that they will reach by paddleboat. What's really funny is that while Jill is discussing the fact that she saw the place they have to find on the map before, you can tell that she's still working on digesting the cheese, which seems to be trying to creep back up her esophagus.

Everyone drives onto the car train, which then takes off. FloZach winds up on the train just in front of the twins, and when they get going, she bails out of the FloZach car to go and sit with Drew and Derek. Here is an example of the charged Flo/Drew banter to which we are subjected. Flo: "What if we get eliminated today because I didn't want to bungee?" Drew: "Well, that's what you have to think of, right?" I'm sorry, is that it? God. I've had sexier exchanges going through airport security. Flo voices over that they're "innocently flirting." It's kind of sad when you have to explain that what you're doing is supposed to be flirting. She's really not very good at it. Zach voices over that it's "a little strange" being stuck by himself in the FloZachmobile. He apparently doesn't realize at this point that he will soon only wish that he could travel alone and ship Flo separately.

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Amazing Race

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