Amazing Race
Why Did You Have To Take Your Pants Off?!, Part I

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Everything Flo's downhill from here

Ken and Gerard approach the Chateau route marker next. When they pull the clue, it's a Roadblock. This week's Roadblock is to put together a Swiss Army bike from a pile of parts. Man, if I hadn't already used this joke, I would totally have to wonder whether that bike has tweezers and a toothpick. I think I need another Switzerland angle. (And no, I'm sorry, neutrality just isn't that funny.) At any rate, they have a finished bike to use as a model, but they have to get a guy to certify the bike they make as correctly built before they can leave, because they're going to be riding the bikes when they go. Gerard takes the Roadblock for the Bald Snark. Kenny offers him some encouragement, and Gerard says, "I just don't want to disappoint you, Ken." Heh. I have a feeling Gerard wants more quiet and less encouragement, though it's just a guess. He remarks that putting together the bike is "like Christmas Eve at home."

Now, Derek and Drew reach the Roadblock. You'll notice, incidentally, that bungee jumping had absolutely no time advantage at all, so this is a very poorly designed leg all around. At first, Drew seems to think Derek should do it, but Derek deflects it back. I have to say that if I were Drew, I would have made Derek do it. He's much too pushy and demanding to sit and watch someone else work on something this complicated. I suspect that if anything, his "encouragement" will only make Drew more nervous.

Accompanied by more yodeling, we return to Gerard, who has apparently finished the bike, but who is told by Certification Guy that his bike is "not safe." He then realizes that he didn't put the chain on. Heh. He does the chain, and he and Kenny are sure it's "perfect," but CG says, "No good." CG is hard to please. He's like one of those fussy dogs that won't eat anything you feed it.

Elsewhere, FloZach is lost on their way to the Chateau. They get directions and get moving. Somewhere, Teri and Ian do the same.

Once again, CG breaks it to Gerard that the bike is "not safe," and Derek kibitzes while Drew tries to work. Gerard: "Perfect!" CG: "Not safe." After one more try, CG gives Gerard the go, and he and Kenny grab their clue. It tells them to bike to the paddleboats by the steamship. Phil tells us that it's a three-mile bike ride, so that's really not terribly far. Phil explains that the boat is still the pit stop for this leg. Thanks, Phil!

FloZach reads the clue, and at the mention of "nuts and bolts," Flo points at Zach and says, "You." Of course, she generally does. Drew is still working as Zach passes him and starts in on the bike. Derek? Still bitching. "Do it with your fingers like you did the other one!" Hee hee. I would say I'm twelve, but I may be less mature than that.

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Amazing Race

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