Amazing Race
Why Did You Have To Take Your Pants Off?!, Part I

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | 1 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Everything Flo's downhill from here

Asshat arrives just as the Bald Snark and FloZach are leaving. As soon as he sees them, Gerard tells them about the phone call. This makes Teri run up the hill, which is nice. It's good to know there are human beings somewhere in the world about whom she is happy. If you're only going to like two people on the entire earth, it's nice that they're your kids. She and Ian start in on the goats.

At the parking lot, Flo is yapping with her friend, while Kenny runs to the car. "Flo! Talk all day, Flo!" he yells happily. God, he is so cute. "Take your time, honey!" he yells again with a jaunty wave. "I love you, I love you," Flo babbles into the phone. She hangs up at last and runs to the car.

Drew is hauled back up onto the bridge after the jump, and he talks about how great it was, blah dee blah. He reads the Chateau de Chillon clue, and they leave. Of course, if this is being edited at all accurately, they saved practically no time by doing the jump. Damn, that is cold. Reckless/Chicken requires that reckless have an advantage, or it's pretty much Sucker/Chicken. They are happy about the prospect of the phone call, which this Detour choice also offers. Derek calls home, where his wife is waiting. She's young and pretty (unsurprisingly), and her shirt provides just a teeny bit more information than I really needed. It's basically side-of-breast information, to put it rather bluntly. She also slips into a baby-talk voice, so she does lose a point for that. Derek interviews about being a newlywed, and how it's hard to "go from that kind of companionship to...nothing." I think he misses all the conversation. He talks about how much he misses her, and then he says, "Drew, do you want to say hi to Mom real quick?"

God, that pissed me off. They've got Mom there to talk to Drew, but of course Derek assumes that when you say "loved ones at home," that means married people or people with kids, because single people have no important loved ones. Seriously, the fact that he would even ask that is just rude. What did he think Drew would say? "Oh, no, you just hang up. I'm just a single guy, so I don't miss my family or anything." We had this argument in the summer about the Big Brother family contact issue -- people who are single love and miss their friends and family too, and I honestly hope that Derek looks at this now and wants to whap himself on the head with a book, which is what I wanted to do. I also appreciate the "real quick," like, "I'm done talking, but you can say hi before we hang up." Shut up, Derek. Anyway, Drew talks to Mom, who sounds like she's very nice. I like their mom. She's also extremely pretty, which I guess shouldn't surprise me. Of course, before they hang up, Derek gets back on the phone with his wife, just to reinforce that that is the real purpose of the call, irrespective of the irrelevant Drew/Mom interruption. Shut up some more, Derek. I understand that you miss your wife, but the world is not solely about you simply because you're recently married. Man, I hate that.

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Amazing Race

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