Amazing Race
We're Not At Charm School Learning How To Be A Gentleman, We're Racing

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
To sleep, perchance to scream

Kelly and BuffJon are still looking for the hot springs clue. He voices over that they "got a little confused," so they "got in a nice Stairmaster workout" while they tromped up and down various hills looking for the clue. "We were dead last," she voices over, "and realized, 'We're lost.'" Kelly turns around to shoot a look of pure hate over her shoulder.

Commercials. Your family's happiness depends on cleaning up spills without dripping. It's beginning to worry the dog.

BuffJon finally spots the markers, but he's out ahead of Kelly and has to call back to her. "Let's go, Kelly, I see it," he says. "Shut up!" she says, not really listening. "I see it," he repeats. "You do not!" she calls back. "Kelly, move your ass, now," he says through his teeth. I actually was bugged by that a lot more than the stuff later that got talked up so much more. Only the fact that she was, in fact, being a pointlessly obstinate goofball gives me some degree of sympathy with his position. Still? Not cool. It does get her to shut up and move, though. Soon, they are at the clue box, and it's time for the funniest rip-and-read of all time. Basically, BuffJon has himself focused on the idea of reading Malaysian place names, so he's primed for something very exotic when Kelly tells him to just open the Fast Forward and not even bother with the regular clue. He reads it: "Drive yourselves to Spee...Spee-lo-wik...oh...oh-rahn-twang..." A disbelieving Kelly breaks in. "'Orangutan'?" she says disgustedly, peeking over his shoulder and looking at this not-very-hard word. I have to say that her delivery of that was absolutely priceless, and it makes BuffJon completely crack up when he figures it out. See, that's what I'm talking about when I say that he's certainly an ass, but he doesn't mind if you feed it back to him, which makes him a lot less objectionable to me. He can laugh at you being an idiot, but he can also laugh at himself being an idiot, as he did right there. She rolls her eyes and starts to smile as we cut to Phil, who gives the spiel on the week's Fast Forward. It's located at the Sepilok ("Speelowik," Jon?) Orangutan Sanctuary, where the last wild orangutans in northern Borneo hang out. When they get there, the team will have to hike to a feeding station and feed fruit to the monkeys in order to get the clue. (Yes, I know they're not monkeys. You try typing "orangutan" thirty times and see how sick of it you are.) While Phil explains the Fast Forward, a pair of orangutans put on a show in the background.

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Amazing Race




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