Amazing Race
We're Not At Charm School Learning How To Be A Gentleman, We're Racing

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
To sleep, perchance to scream

As the two teams drive, Millie and Chuck on the bumper of Jon and Kelly's SUV, Chuck asks Millie where they're going. "There's nothing," she says quietly. She starts to hand him the map, even though he's driving. "Look at this map," she says. "You're better at reading maps..." "Forget it, I can't look right now, baby," he says. "They're going to follow us," Kelly says up ahead, "because we were there for the Fast Forward -- we know exactly where it is." So this is the dynamic that's developing -- Kelly and BuffJon know where they're going, and Chuck and Millie don't know and can't stop to figure it out because they have to follow. For that reason, even if he could figure out a way to pass them, Chuck can't do it, because he wouldn't know where he was going. This basically guarantees Jon and Kelly the lead heading into the entrance of the resort. "I'm sorry," Millie despairs in her car as the last remnants of her ever-lovin' mind pack their bags. "I don't know what I'm doin', please look at the map, Chuck! I can't read them!" He can't look at the map! He's driving the car! Sheesh. Get her some sleep, man. Like, now. Chuck calmly explains that he's just going to follow BuffJon, so they'll still have a chance to "sprint it out" at the end. And indeed, there is reason to think that Millie might fare well in a sprint against Kelly, at least under normal circumstances. Which these, of course, are not.

Team Who hits the mat, briefly distracting us from the race to the finish. Yeah, yeah, team number three -- get me back to the road race.

Chuck stays right with Jon and Kelly. "They're right on our asses," Kelly comments. As BuffJon goes to pass a slow-moving truck, Chuck encounters a new problem, in that he's unable to quite find the gear he wants. "He can't shift," BuffJon observes as he watches Millie and Chuck's car drop back in the rearview mirror. By the time Chuck finds the gear, the gap between them has grown a little, but then Chuck seems to get himself back in it, because he seems to be right behind, asking Millie to watch Jon and Kelly carefully. "Keep your eyes open," Chuck says, "'cause if they do somethin' tricky..." "I can totally see them doing something tricky," Millie says. Like what? They're going to the same pit stop you are -- what are they going to do? Kelly, enjoying the race quite a lot at the moment, cheers Jon on as they pass another truck. They reach the entrance. "Focus, and look for flags," Kelly says, undoubtedly hoping they don't repeat the morning's hot springs disaster. It would suck, indeed, to win the road race and then spend half an hour wandering around asking a bunch of orangutans if they've seen any red and yellow flags.

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Amazing Race

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