Amazing Race
We're Not At Charm School Learning How To Be A Gentleman, We're Racing

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
To sleep, perchance to scream

At the ladders (conveniently, there are two), the boys are strapped into their gear at the same time. "Go fast, Chuck!" Millie encourages. Chuck gets up onto the ladder first. "Hurry hurry hurry hurry!" Kelly calls out. Jon gets going. Using her favorite rather weird form of encouragement, Millie says, "You're good at this, Chuck!" She goes on, "This is all your time to shine! Be aggressive, Chuck, be aggressive!" I have to say, if she doesn't win the race, Millie would be great at corporate motivational seminars. ["Her sincerity tone of voice could use some work, in my opinion. If by 'some,' you mean 'a lot.'" -- Sars] We go to a wide view that includes both guys, complete with labels to show you Chuck on his ladder and Jon on his. Jon begins to gain on Chuck. "Yeah, babe, go!" Kelly yells. "You're right there with him!" she calls. "No, he's not, Chuck," Millie spits. Oh, come on. Do you have to answer the other person's cheering of her boyfriend? Furthermore, Millie thinks she's helping, but it might be just as well for Chuck to know that Jon is in fact gaining on him rapidly, because it's true. Jon begins to make up big time on Chuck at this point, and by the time they reach the transition to the horizontal crawl, it's essentially a dead heat. Millie sucks her inhaler while a Darth Vader-like sound plays on the soundtrack. Which is a little much, perhaps.

Oh, hey, the pit stop! Remember the pit stop? The clowns are arriving. Welcome, ClownJon and Al, you are team number two. They high-five.

Back at the caves, the race is on. Jon and Chuck shimmy out onto the ladders to grab for the baskets. They both get clues and both head down, but for whatever reason, Jon seems to pick up the rhythm of the descent a little more easily than Chuck, and picks up some time on him on the way down. "You got him, babe, you got him!" Kelly says happily as Jon flies down the ladder. Millie rubs her forehead in despair. Near the bottom, Chuck makes the unwise decision to sort of jump for it, and because of the style of harness he's wearing, this causes him to be caught up and left dangling by the harness. Now THAT is a nutbunch! (Thank you very much, I'm here all week.) It takes a minute for Chuck to get straightened out and lowered the rest of the way, so he loses a bit more time. BuffJon, still carrying the clue in his teeth, makes his way over to Kelly. He works on getting free of his equipment as Chuck finally gets free and makes it over to Millie. Jon and Kelly jog out of the caves, having grabbed a very slight lead. Millie and Chuck are close behind. As she runs, Kelly says, "Come on...I hear 'em. This is our chance." She is understandably salivating at the thought of this entire scenario, basically. Jon and Kelly drive out of the parking lot just as Millie and Chuck are loading up the car. "We can beat 'em," Kelly says. As they drive, she is full of praise. "You did awesome, you did so...babe, I'm not even exaggerating -- you were like a chimpanzee climbing that ladder. He went at least thirty seconds in front of you [not!] and you beat him down." She claps. "We are redeemed!" Hee.

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Amazing Race




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