Amazing Race
We Was Robbed

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Trey & Lexi show up at yet another destination and ask their driver to wait, which is good, because they've arrived at an empty courtyard. Back on the road, Lexi has opened her car window to let some fresh air in and gets splashed square in the face by a passing bus. Is this a reality show or a sitcom?

In the meantime, Jaymes & James's driver has apparently driven them directly to the right place. Inside, they find a guy sitting outside a closed classroom door with a handwritten sign in Russian taped to it. Presumably it's telling them it opens at 8:00, but the word before the time looks more like "Beyoncé" to them. That would be quite a get for this show. Jaymes interviews that this is a new experience for them; "We never get to places and can't find anyone because we're first. We get to places and can't find anyone because we're last." They ask their driver to wait with them inside. He agrees, even though he seems rather unimpressed with not only their matching names, but their very existence.

Lexi tries to get their driver to turn around and go back. Instead, they pull up to a hotel, where a desk clerk translates for them and gives directions. Thus they finally find the place and join Jaymes & James in waiting. "This is the most miserable morning we've ever had," Trey volunteers, apropos of nothing. In due time the bell rings and they're allowed inside the large, auditorium-style classroom. The giant Speed Bump sign directly inside the door, with James & Abba's faces on it, is pretty hard to miss, and Jaymes concludes that the previous leg was non-elimination. On top of which Jaymes is pretty surprised to see them there at all, given that they were with them on the first flight at the start of the previous leg. "So something had to go terribly wrong and they got saved, obviously, but we don't know what happened." A lot of stuff happened, Jaymes. A lot of stuff.

Speaking of James and Abba, they're in their hotel room packing, which is a very quick process under the circumstances. Basically everything currently in their possession is what they're stealing from the hotel. I hope they're looking forward to traveling the rest of the way around the world with nothing to their names but several small bottles of toiletries.

At the classroom, the two lead teams open the clue, which is for a Roadblock. "Who's in the zone?" Jaymes reads. Cut to Phil alone in the classroom, which has a large time zone map of Russia projected on the front screen. He tells us that Russia is the world's largest country, "Almost twice the size of the United States." For the Roadblocks, the racers will be shown that time zone map -- displaying all nine time zones, each with a different color and a number indicating how many hours it is ahead of what I assume is Greenwich Mean Time -- then a local Moscow time. Based on that, they'll have to correctly figure out what time it is in five other Russian cities scattered around the country and write them down on a test sheet, whereupon the "professor" will give them their next clue. The "professor," by the way, is tweedy, gray-haired and so severe-looking that he clearly came not from academia but from central casting.

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Amazing Race

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