Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | 2 USERS: A+
Breaking the Mold

Zev and Justin are digging in the snow, or rather Justin is, because Zev can't seem to figure out how to operate his collapsible snow shovel. Zev admits in a post-leg interview that they didn't know how to dig the body out. Gary and Mallory's helicopter passes overhead, and touches down nearby. They start their search, and the wind kicks up, with thick, horizontal ground-blizzards whipping past all of them constantly. But at least Gary and Mallory have honed in on their signal, so they start digging as well.

The Gothicopter lands, and Kent is already whining about the cold. In the background, Kisha has lowered Jen to the right depth. Jen interviews that it's all about communication, which tells us that the Goths are so going to rock this. But first, Jen clips the carabiner on the dude, and tells Kisha to crank her back up. Soon Vyxsin is lowering Kent into the crevasse, which is wise because he's both smaller and weaker than she is. He interviews, "Just think, you're stuck down in a crevice, and lo and behold, Kent and Vyxsin show up upon the scene, coming down into the hole to get you." "I'll just wait for the next rescue team, thank you very much," jokes Vyxsin, along with the rest of the world. By the way, in this post-leg interview she's looking like even more of a horror than usual, with giant pink pigtails as well as every facial piercing and blot of makeup she owns. So she took the time to tart herself up to eleven after this leg? Hmmm...

The Globetrotters have arrived, and after we briefly listen to them marvel about ending up here in the Swiss Alps after their "humble beginnings," Big Easy is lowering Flight Time in. Kent keeps hollering up to Vyxsin to let him down, like she isn't cranking as fast as she can. I would try to explain to Kent about gear ratios and how you sacrifice speed so that a skinny little Goth chick can turn a crank that lifts and lowers a dude who's nearly half her size, but he wouldn't listen and I don't fully understand it myself. Besides, I'm distracted by the superclose helmet cams they have to wear down into the crevasse and how Kent's makes his glitter-dusted nose look even beakier than usual. After getting down to where he can reach the guy, he hollers up at Vyxsin to stop lowering him, but she doesn't hear him because she's cranking so fast. Within seconds, he's screaming in panic to "Staaawp!" as she keeps cranking away. Wouldn't it be awful if he ended up inside the earth's core?

Unfortunately, we're not back from the ads very long at all before Vyxsin hears him, cranks him back up to the right height, and Kent hooks the rope to the guy. "Pull me up!" Kent hollers. Oddly, Vyxsin doesn't even seem to have to think about it.

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Amazing Race




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