Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Breaking the Mold

Kent is still having a quiet freak-out about being shunned by the taxis of Zermatt, and is taking it personally. "I'm really offended. I'm just going to beat somebody up today." Okay, who? I don't think there's a person on the race Kent could take. Mel White, maybe, but only if Mel had just finished a leg that Kent had sat out. But Kent seems determined to beat someone up, so consider this a warning to the preteen children of Zermatt to steer clear of Kent this morning. Vyxsin interviews that he's "overreactionary and hypersensitive," and tries to tell him to stay positive. "Punching somebody would be very positive right now," Kent says, but Vyxsin tells him to stop "making me sad." Seeing another taxi coming, Kent jumps out into the road in front of it, but the taxi turns off before it reaches him anyway, which cracks me up. Sadly, it's the one they ordered, pulling over to let them on. Which is enough to fix Kent's state of mind. "I can stop hating everything now," he says, and they tell their driver to get them to the heliport, "schnell." Or they could have walked there by now. Assuming Vyxsin was willing to carry him, that is.

Gary and Mallory arrive at the heliport and sign up for the third slot. En route, the Globetrotters are talking about how after they get rich at the finish line, they'll give Phil this leg's one dollar. Kent and Vyxsin get to the sign-up sheet in fourth place somehow, and then the Globetrotters sign up for the fifth slot.

More Dramatic shots of the Matterhorn, the windward side of which seems to be a perma-cauldron of blowing snow. Zev and Justin, in matching red parkas, are both a little nervous in advance of boarding their first-ever helicopter. Jen tells Kisha, "It's about to be the best experience that you'll never get to have again." Kisha's cool with that last part. Mallory tells us, "We're going somewhere dangerous because we have a lot of safety gear on." Whatever, all that says is that there won't be watermelons. Kent says this is the first time they're going somewhere when they have no clue where it is. I think that's overstating things in his and Vyxsin's case. The Globetrotters are more concerned with the timeline than anything else. And Zev is worried about the Goths. "I wonder if the snow is gonna take off their eyebrows?" Fair question.

At last, Zev and Justin get to open their clue. It's a Detour, the options being "Search" or "Rescue." Phil narrates, "The alpine glaciers surrounding the Matterhorn are extremely dangerous. The unpredictable crevasses are always cracking and avalanches can occur at any moment." So let's drop ten American game show contestants up there, shall we? We see Phil out on the snowfield, telling us that they'll have to "choose between two ways of bringing a stranded mountaineer to safety." For "Search," "teams brave extreme wind conditions and use an avalanche beacon to locate a training dummy that's been buried somewhere on this glacier." After they've found it, they have to dig it up and haul it to the surface, like the PAs in front of Phil are doing, to receive their next clue. For "Rescue," they use a special block and tackle to rescue an actual, extremely unlucky, guy. To do this, one re-racer is lowered into the crevasse to clips a rescue line to him. Then that re-racer gets reeled back up, and they two of them will pull up the stranded man together to get their next clue. By the way, I hope they closed the Matterhorn for the day so there aren't any real emergencies while the rescue helicopter fleet is tied up..

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Amazing Race

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