Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now!
Have You Herd?

Having found the dockmaster, a young man in a blue cap and uniform sitting on a bench, Tiffany calls Maria over with the tray. Maria sets it down and starts mixing as we see her interview that apparently she's a big eater, mixer, and server of Pho. Well, that's a lucky break. They sure drew a full house on this one. The dockmaster approves, seemingly to his own surprise, and gives them their clue. Tiffany gets to suffer the combined televised indignity of the subtitles "Currently in last place" and the spectacle of her slipping on the seat of the boat and toppling over into the keel.

Meghan and Cheyne are moving right along, getting "down and dirty," as he accurately puts it. Lance does a lot of complaining. Cheyne gets Matt to help him pull out his stuck leg so he can get out of the way faster. Well played, that. There's a whole montage of people struggling and slipping and getting very messy, though Ericka calls the experience "sensual." Well, the mud should be good for everyone's skin tone.

Meghan and Cheyne are just about done, while Garrett and Jessica don't let the task get in the way of their bickering. "These people are amazing," Ericka says of the locals as she hefts a pan of mud. "They actually do this." Gary and Matt, coming from the farm, are in their comfort zone. No real standouts as we see the other teams doing it, except that Marcy is going very slowly and Zev is complaining about being sweaty and dirty. This isn't part of his daily routine? Dude needs to get out more.

Meghan and Cheyne hold onto their lead and get finished first. They get another Route Info clue, which is sending them back to the dock to return their boats and proceed thence from Cai Be field, where they'll get their next clue. Since it looks like the next task will involve large flocks of ducks, this can't be bad. They're back in their boat and on their way (despite a spill from Meghan that drops her into an involuntary squat in the bottom of the boat) by the time the poker chicks arrive. As soon as they step off their boar, Tiffany starts slipping and sliding right off the bat. Is she wearing shoes without treads or something? Trying to be the first person to run the entire Amazing Race in ballet slippers?

Garrett and Jessica finish up and head out of there in second place. Brian and Ericka are right behind them in third. Gary and Matt finish in fourth, having covered a lot more of the ribbon than Brian and Ericka did. The Globetrotters are out in fifth, with Sam and Dan behind them. Mika and Canaan feel close to done, and as Tiffany scoops mud into her pan, she tells us, "Girls and mud is so sexy." Especially if the girl talks about it. Marcy has Ron call for a farmer check, although it sounds like he's saying "Farmer Jack!" Which is almost certainly not his name. Farmer Jack says they're done. So are Lance and Keri, out in eighth place. Justin and Zev finish in ninth place. Going back to the boat to retrieve their Amazing Purse, Justin slips on the steep gangplank, and as he falls, his momentum carries him clear over the far side of the sampan and into the delta. He hauls himself out, at least cleaner than he was before, and he and Zev are ready to go. Mika and Canaan finish up right behind them. But as their boat takes them out into the current, Zev and Justin have the always-dreaded "do you have the clue?" "I thought you had the clue" conversation. Neither of them does, and Mika|Canaan are on their way, with Team Inside Straight not far behind. Team Asperger's is now in the unenviable position of being two slots from the back with no idea where they're going. I think this calls for a commercial break, and clearly I am not alone.

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Amazing Race




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