Amazing Race
TARCon 3: The Con Continues To Grow

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 2 USERS: A+
Who's the loud girl in the red?

Now she's back over by the table where she was before. She and Kevin spot each other, and he comes over. "Flo and Zach?" he says incredulously. "Are you fucking kidding me with that? Are you fucking kidding me with that?" "I know," she says. "You can quote me on that," he says. And then they exchange a little hug. ["Kevin worked even bluer in his comments to Sars a little while later." -- Bruckheimer]

A bit later, we see her again with Frank, standing against the opposite wall. Mr. Pseudostudent approaches and exchanges a greeting with Frank. "Mr. Pseudo is my secret boyfriend," Alli explains. Frank adopts a shocked expression. "I thought I was your secret boyfriend! Don't lie to these people," he says. "You know I'm your secret boyfriend." Loraxe approaches with her camera at around this time, as do a few other people, and there is quite a bit of posing. Pictures are taken of Alli and Frank with their hands on each other's chests, and then they offer up a good sloppy smooch. When the flash fails on the first one, they offer another. I wouldn't put it past Alli to have interfered with the flash by mental telepathy, because you must admit that worked out fairly well for her.

A buzz mutters through the crowd, and it becomes clear that a great injustice has been righted. Chris and Alex missed TARCon 2, you'll remember, because they were reportedly too drunk to be allowed out on their own only a few hours before they were due on The Early Show. I can't literally tell you that you hear Alli's brain make a "sproing" noise when they come in, but she certainly does appear to snap to attention. Certainly hope she's enjoying the shallow end. We see her chatting in a friendly manner with Alex about the number of TWoP usernames he has chewed up and spit out as a result of losing his various passwords. And then we see her sidling (and when I say "sidling" in this context, I am not kidding) in the direction of Chris. She appears to be attempting a friendly, unthreatening expression. The funny editors throw in a shot of her, again apparently taken from earlier in the evening, in which she is telling someone, quite matter-of-factly, "Chris? Hmm, I don't know. If he shows up, it's possible I might bite him on the neck." It's nice to see someone be that willing to serve up her dignity on crackers, isn't it? At any rate, she finally makes it over to him and introduces herself. There is a glimmer of recognition and a smirk. "Dude, what's up?" he says to her. "Dude, what's up?" she says back. HA! Did you see that? She was paralyzed. Repeated it right back. Tried to make it look like mockery, but it was lust. That wasn't even deer-in-the-headlights. That was deer-already-run-over-by-truck. That was right up there with "I carried a watermelon." If she were any less smooth, she would be a bag of broken glass. You can't blame her, of course, because quite honestly, he is...lovely. And tall. Chalk up another one who didn't come across on television adequately during his season. Zoiks.

Oh, hey, look! It's Mary and Peach! They didn't make it last time, either, so it's nice to see them. They work their way through the crowd. They are probably the best-decked-out women at this party, both lovely and quite glam. This is approximately what Alli says when she encounters them. "My gosh, everybody is so gorgeous and glamorous." Unfortunately, this apparently comes across as something akin to, "You'd never guess from how dumpy you looked on television," which I don't think is quite what she meant. "Well, the show really takes it out of you," Mary says warily. Aaaand it's another moment of grace.

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