Amazing Race
Ready To Lose Our Lives

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
Contestants do get woolly, 'cause of all the stress

Taraweasel and Boston both commit to the jump, but Wil still looks seriously, seriously unwell. It's pretty clear that this is not run-of-the-mill bungee nervousness. The guy is, not to put too fine a point on it, fuckin' terrified. And interestingly, what it does is infuse Wil with a shot of humility, which I think is why sympathy for Wil was a common reaction during this sequence. His whole arrogant, self-righteous thing has been completely derailed, and that's why he doesn't seem quite as hideous as usual. Don't worry, it won't last. As he and Tara are hooked up to the equipment, she voices over that his knees were knocking into hers, and as they venture out onto the platform, you can literally see the guy shaking. And a guy has to be shaking pretty hard for you to be able to spot it on TV.

Commercials. Go to Cattle Company, because there's really no such thing as too much red meat.

Bungee Gorge Of Doom, Weird Buzzing Music Of Phobia-Fighting. Wil and Tara are at the edge of the platform, wearing their matching brown Adidas-ish warm-up jackets (yeah, I don't know what they're thinking). They jump. Gravity has its way with them, and as they dangle at the end of the cord, she laughs hysterically out of what is presumably a combination of exhilaration and relief. Up at the platform, Alex laughs hysterically, too, because there's really nothing funnier than seeing your girlfriend and her husband cheating death. Tara voices over that she gives Wil full credit for having done the jump in spite of his fear of heights. And you know what? Me, too. Shhh, don't tell anybody. "How do you feel?" she asks him. "All right," he lies with a tight smile, as they continue to hang upside-down. Aw. They're laid out on the ground and untied, and as they run over to the McFlag and grab the clue, he comments that it was "pretty cool," and beams some more. "I did it, Tara," he says. She gives him a hug, and just for a second, you can sort of understand how maybe, maybe, they might have once liked each other. Anyway, enough of the warm and fuzzy. The clue says to go to the Inverary Sheep Station, which Phil says is a little more than three hundred miles away. We get a lovely barrage of rapid-fire shots as the details are explained, and they look like this: Sheep! Sheep! Sheep! Sheepsheepsheepsheep! Sheep! Wil and Tara choose a red SUV and take off. As usual, he's driving, and she's navigating. "Boner, does that mean we're together again, since we tandemed that sucker?" he asks her in the car. (Number of men who have ever made romantic progress while calling their wives "Boner": Zero.) "No, absolutely not," she says, a bit more coldly than was perhaps required, given the fact that I think there was a hint of levity in the question. He's actually a tiny bit funny as he says, "I thought it meant that we were back together." She says no, but she's still proud of him for doing it. He says he experienced a "face death, love life" moment. I feel a twinge of sympathy for him, but fortunately, he's gonna be a bastard again next week, and I think we all know it.

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Amazing Race




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