Amazing Race
Quit Following Us

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | 1 USERS: A+
Hysterical Landmarks

Kris and Jon are standing by the automatic ticket kiosks, while the person who directed Jonathan up to the S-bahn is still trying heroically to do the same for them. Kris looks confused and a little worried. No, seriously. And this is going to seem unkind, but, um, I can see why she smiles so much.

Hayden and Aaron arrive at the train station at roughly the same time as Gus and Hera. Journalistic integrity would compel me to comment that Hayden thanks her cab driver, if I had any. Bolo and Lori arrive soon after. Bolo asks a local for directions to "where they knocked the Berlin Wall down," making what he thinks is the universal gesture for swinging a hammer, but is really the universal gesture for something else. Unless "swinging the hammer" is what the kids are calling it these days. They too are directed to the S-train. Hayden and Aaron, Gus and Hera, and Kris and Jon get on the next train, which leaves poor Lori and Bolo still stuck on the platform. Hayden give a cheery wave goodbye. Man, shit like that is going to bite her ass clean off, and then her pants are going to fall the rest of the way down. Don and MJ are just arriving at the train station as Lori and Bolo hop the next train. The older team wanders around inside the station looking confused. And doomed.

At the Warschauer Strasse station (which I remember enough junior-high German to translate to "Warschauer Street"), Nuance, Hornio, and Jonathan and Victoria disembark from their train. They jog a couple of blocks to what's left of the Berlin Wall. Jonathan narrates for us what we can clearly see, which is that while the other teams went "inside the Wall" (whatever that means), he and Victoria went along the Wall. Sure enough, while the other teams are bumbling around, he and Victoria find the clue box, prompting the appearance on my screen of those hated words, "Jonathan & Victoria: Currently in 1st Place." Dammit. Just for a second, I kind of miss the razor wire and searchlights and guns and stuff. They jump into a cab. Their next destination is quite a mouthful for Victoria. Phil's VO doesn't even try to pronounce it for her. Instead, he explains that they have to go through downtown Berlin to a church that was partially destroyed during World War II -- or, more accurately, to a sculpture of gigantic broken chain links that stands across the street from the church. Broken chains are very big this week. I wonder if they'll inspire Victoria to get a divorce. Anyway, they're already on their way.

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Amazing Race




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