Amazing Race
Oh, Wow! It's Like One Of Those Things You See On TV!

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | 1 USERS: A+
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Birdcages, Flowers, And John McCain

Dave and Mary are a little ways down the street toward the pit stop when they realize they don't have the fanny pack, so Dave tells ankled Mary to wait, and he runs back for it.

Welcome, Tyler and James. You are team number two.

Duke and Lauren work on their birdcage. Dave returns and grabs the fanny pack. The *lyns get their bricks done and leave. Peter and Sarah are moving, and Peter says something to Mary about whether they've "got everything," and I can't tell whether that's supposed to be polite or whether it's disgustingly assy, but I think he was trying to be nice, in his way. Peter does tell Sarah that they can outrun Dave and Mary. Duke and Lauren are almost finished with their birdcage. Rob and Kimberly and Dustin and Kandice are heading across the rice paddy toward Phil, and it's the Pointies who get there first. Welcome, you're team number three. And the BQs are team number four.

And then, the worst shot of the episode. Traversing the rice paddy appears to require walking down a narrow path that won't work with Sarah's leg in its current condition, so as Peter blithely walks ahead of her yapping about how great their teamwork was, she hunkers down and sort of crab-crawls it, holding on with her hands as she scoots forward. That is a tough girl. I mean, it's not like I expect him to give her a ride unless she wants, but he could act like he's aware of where in the hell she is. Otherwise, it makes him look like the biggest prick ever born, and frankly, even if this doesn't actually mean he's the biggest prick ever born, I'm happy that for all the other prick behaviors, he is suffering this indignity. They land on the mat and are team number five. "Guys, this has got to suck," Phil says to Tom and Terry as they wait out their penalty. Heh. Doesn't suck for me!

Duke and Lauren finish and turn in their birdcage, so they can head for the pit stop at last. At the finish mat, Tom and Terry boo-hoo over their rules violation.

My favorite part of the episode is this: Mary and Dave are on their way to the pit stop when they realize that there's a team behind them. It turns out that it's their friends, Lyn and Karlyn. The *lyns do run fast, but Lyn calls out, "You've got to hurry, Mary, hurry, hurry." In an interview, Lyn says she is not a "fair-weather friend." Aw. As these two teams walk together toward the pit stop, Mary trips and falls. "Mary fell," says Lyn, stopping to look back. Dave tells them to go on ahead, and they do, which is fair. Welcome, Lyn and Karlyn, you're team number six. And you, Dave and Mary, are team number seven. Mary's ankle is clearly really bothering her as she and Dave hobble up to the mat. Lyn and Mary hug. Phil asks Lyn how hard the race is, and she talks about how it's very frustrating, and she and Karlyn are both all weepy, I think mostly because it was hard for them to pass Mary and Dave thinking they might be in last, and partly because they know about the Tom and Terry penalty. Because Karlyn talks about how you're "sorry for the friends that you made" when bad things happen to them. See? They looked mean in the first episode, but I think that was mostly just nerves and getting the race started. And the fact that Peter is a prick, which they turned out to be right about anyway. The *lyns express some weirdness about passing Dave and Mary, and Mary immediately says, "You had to." Mary happily interviews about how her friends are Lyn and Karlyn, the *wins, and Tom and Terry. So Mary, who's from Kentucky and hasn't ever known gay or Asian people, has decided that her friends are the African-American team, the gay team, and the Asian-American team. I'm sorry, but that is a little bit cool. Whatever the Kentucky small-town version of "straight but not narrow" is, that's kind of how I see Mary.

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Amazing Race

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