Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A | Grade It Now!
Those Who Red the Clue and Those Who Blue It

Cue Phil, addressing us from a marketplace as he tells us that this is about "two professions seen on the streets of India." "Bleary Eyed" is accompanied by a shot of a bird's nest tangle of power lines; "Teary Eyed" by a bowl full of crushed chili peppers. I think I can see where this is going. "Bleary Eyed" requires teams to "help the Department of Power" by going to a specific street corner. Amid the hopelessly tangled power lines overhead, which make the space under my desk look positively tidy, are a series of small, numbered tags. Teams will follow along the power lines at street level, looking up and reading the tags hanging from one specific line. Then they'll bring their list to this total ham of a local who's sitting behind a sewing machine on a corner, and he'll check their list. If the list is right, the dude will point them across the street, where they'll make use of some of that power by plugging in a lighted, musical Ganesha statue, whereupon they'll get their next clue. "The small numbers are easy to miss among the tangled wires and the many local business advertisements," Phil warns, "but teams with good eyes and the ability to concentrate could find the speed of their success... shocking." Wow, Phil. There's deadpan, and then there's dead-eyed. He did not enjoy having to say that.

Let's hope for better from "Teary Eyed," which, as Phil explains, sends teams to a spice market to fetch two forty-pound sacks of dried chili peppers, which they'll have to schlep a quarter mile on foot to the local shop. There, they'll have to crush them using large mortars and completely phallic-looking pestles until they've filled up a large bowl to the fill line to get their next clue. And now Phil has to say, "The task seems straightforward, but close contact with these powerful chilies could be physically painful. And teams betting on brawn over brains could find themselves lit'rally and figuratively... burned." Oh, poor Phil. Back at the Bird Hospital, Nick and Starr decide to do Bleary Eyed.

Toni and Dallas's cab has come to a stop outside the right place, and a crowd of children has gathered around, reaching inside to shake hands and calling out, "Hello! Hello! Hello!" It's all so aggressively friendly. Toni and Dallas get out to walk, Dallas telling the kids, "Come, come, show me, show me."

Nick and Starr hire a bicycle rickshaw to get to the Detour. Since it only has two seats, their crew has to ride on a separate one ahead of them. I assume the fare for both is coming out of Team Divorced's Amazing Purse.

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Amazing Race




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