Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A | Grade It Now!
Those Who Red the Clue and Those Who Blue It

Toni and Dallas arrive at the Road Block in second place, and Dallas is taking this one. Clearly, after Starr's departure, the producers told the locals not to go so easy on the racers, because Dallas has to run a multicolored gauntlet of people who converge on him to throw drifts of dye powder directly into his face. Dye powder makes a surprisingly effective short-range weapon, as it turns out; you can hold a fairly large amount in your hand, and when you throw it, it explodes into a thick cloud of solid color. By the time the cloud disperses, your target has already run through it and is therefore wearing most of it. All of which looks absolutely fantastic on TV.

Kelly and Christy are in their first travelogue portion of the episode. "Not a nice area," one of them says of the neighborhood their taxi is taking them through. And apparently it smells bad, too. The area, that is.

While Dallas is doing the Road Block, Toni can't even see him through the thick clouds of multihued dust hanging in the air. He finds the clue and runs back to her, almost completely pink. Toni seems to have escaped any damage. She's one of the few.

Kelly and Christy are just arriving, having dropped one place in the rankings already. Only three to go. They briefly debate whether to keep their cab driver, and decide to cut him loose because he didn't know how to get there. "We'll find another one," they confidently agree. Remember that. Kelly is going to be doing this one, and if Dallas had to deal with a rainbow burst, she runs into a veritable fireworks display. First comes the dye, then the water, with artillery noises on the soundtrack and everything, until she's completely disoriented and ends up running back to Christy asking for a drink. She's soaked and almost completely black, with bright spots of color here and there so that she looks like one of those deli menu boards, but with Rorschach blots on it instead of today's specials. Christy feels bad for her while she recovers. What I like about this is that for the first time in the entire race, they're not wearing matching outfits any more.

Terence and Sarah arrive outside, as Kelly's getting ready to go back in there, now with a hat, sunglasses, and a bandanna over her lower face. But get this: Christy instructs, "Pull one envelope at a time." No, no, no! Idiots! Read the fucking clue! I want to pull for them but they make it so impossible. Kelly runs in and actually reaches a ladder this time. As we see her climb it, grab one envelope at random, and run it back to Christy, she narrates after the fact (with Christy mysteriously looking rather pink next to her) that she thought this was what she was supposed to do. So of course she gets back to Christy waiting at the clue box, and they open an empty envelope. Well, head on back in there, dumb-ass.

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Amazing Race




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