Amazing Race
Mark Down

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M. Giant: B | Grade It Now!
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Bollywood Travolta

Vanessa and Ralph make it to the Indian Coffee Shop, get their clue, and decide to "Clutch It." At the driving school, Vanessa picks the youngest instructor and hops in next to him in front, while gigantic Ralph somehow gets wedged in with not none, not one, but two passengers in the back. He interviews that this seemed like the simpler task. "Even though I failed Driver's Ed," Vanessa puts in. While she struggles to get started, she admits that she's driven into a few things back home in San Antonio. "Trees...street signs...other cars...the Alamo. It was an accident!" What a shame Art isn't here to talk about how chicks just can't drive like dudes can.

Team Big Brother gets to the Indian Coffee House, but are still debating which Detour to attempt when Art and JJ roll up. Both teams eventually decide on Cricket. Brendon and Rachel get to the stadium just ahead of the Border Patrol, where each racer is given protective gear, instructions, and a Shaun of the Dead bat to prepare. Both Rachel and Art take up their positions in front of the wicket and hit a couple of foul balls, and we leave them with a score of zero-all. The bowler's going to be pretty worn out after this, I'm thinking.

"The underdog always comes up!" Bopper hollers to Mark, who's about to make a fourth attempt. That doesn't even make sense. If it were true, there would be no such thing as an underdog. Which Mark absolutely, demonstrably is, given that there are splitscreen windows showing his fifth and sixth attempts concurrently. So clearly he didn't succeed the fourth time. He manages to get to the end of this last one, but the director insists, "Once more, once more, no." Bopper tells him to keep his head up. But then he says he loves his buddy, and heads over to tell Mark that it's not worth this. Mark insists on continuing to try, and on Bopper getting out of the way so that he can do so.

Other Rachel and Dave easily make it to the Pit Stop, where Dave says of the greeter, "Always the gorgeous women, Phil." Says the guy whose wife looks like Emma Stone. Phil tells them that they're team number one -- again -- and they've won a trip to St. Lucia. This is their fifth win in nine legs, and you can't really blame Dave for saying they're the strongest teams still in the race, "Without a doubt." And by the way, with regard to Art and JJ, Dave promises, "We'll resolve the situation." Other Rachel interrupts, "If not, we'll just beat 'em." Sounds like a win-win proposition, except for the first option.

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Amazing Race

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