Amazing Race
Like James Bond Again

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | 1 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Limping to Victory

Dave & Connor reach a point where the river bed flattens out and Connor spots a clue box, next to rows of personalized red and blue helmets and four-wheel ATVs. Dave hobbles through the shallow water to the bank, his boot in a plastic bag, as Connor chuckles, "I can't believe you're on crutches." Indeed, this really is no place for the Tiny Tim Cratchit routine, but they're still in first place as they open the clue for the Detour. Phil says this is a choice between "two popular New Zealand pastimes," which means the options will have nothing whatsoever to do with each other. For each Detour, the teams have to drive themselves on the ATVs to a separate starting point. For the option called "Rev it Up," Phil is coming to us from a slalom dirt track out in a field amid all this otherwise unspoiled beauty, saying they'll have to "put the pedal to the metal in a modified vintage car." I know, "modified vintage car" sounds cool, but these are all 1970s front-wheel drive hatchbacks of one form or another, so it's going to be less Fast/Furious than Goofy/Gremlin. Phil elaborates that both racers on each team will have to zigzag through the cones in less than 83 seconds total. "Once they complete the course in the allotted time, Flash will hand them their next clue." Flash would be a guy in a racing coverall who looks a lot like a thinner version of my former governor, Jesse Ventura.

"Reel it In" is almost the opposite; instead of driving a fast car, the racers will have to go fishing. Yeah, I know. Each racer will have to stand on the bank with a pole and catch a fish at least twelve inches long out of the river, and then collect their next clue from Dirk, a sad-looking "champion fisherman." Connor says they'll do "Rev it Up," not worried about both of them having to drive, as Jessica & John's boat comes into view behind them. Dave gets on the back of the ATV that Connor drives, splashing through puddles following the mud ruts to the Detour location. Jessica & John and Joey & Meghan are also going with "Rev it Up," as do Max & Katie, because driving cars is fun and fishing sucks. They all get on the four-wheelers and continue enjoying the ride. Mona & Beth, Caroline & Jennifer, Bates & Anthony (who I think I'm just now noticing are described by the subtitles as "Hockey Brothers") and finally Chuck & Wynona are in their boats. Everyone's having a great time, as if anyone watching at home needs convincing that this would be fun to do.

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Amazing Race

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