Amazing Race
It Turned Ugly Just Now

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 1 USERS: A+
Tango and Cash

1:28 AM. Chip and Kim. He speculates, after reading the clue, that they're going to be "Disco Daddy Domino-ing." He voices over that they've done everything wrong up to this point, which is...making them stronger. Hey, I'll admit it's no "I have not yet begun to fight," but as a theory, I like it as much as "we're hoping to leave the obviously erroneous impression that we're weak and stupid."

1:29 AM. Kami/Karli. They reveal, among other things, that the teams received $136 for the leg. Oh, those whimsical race bankers. On the way out, the girls run into Chip and Kim, and Chip tells them to follow him, because he knows the way out. "We love Chip and Kim," says Karli earnestly. "They're good people, we get along with them." The mythical Golden Heifer of Foreshadowing materializes in an otherworldly mist, and gives a halfhearted "Moooo." The two teams get separated while driving, however, and Karli speculates either that they lost Chip and Kim or Chip and Kim lost them. Can't get a thing past her. As Karli navigates from the back seat, Kami bitches something from the front seat about Karli being a perfect navigator and driver, and then Kami's not perfect, she's just better, and come to think of it, I'm pretty sure I saw this argument yesterday on Judge Joe Brown. One or the other of the twins voices over that they're both "best friends" and "worst enemies." Just the way family should be. She says that it's "not pretty" when they argue. It's hard to believe anything about them would not be pretty, isn't it?

1:39 AM. Jim and Marsha. Jim insists that his leg is getting stronger and stronger by the day. You know, Jim is a true inspiration. In fact, interestingly enough, he is such an inspiration that when Miss Alli's Mom fell and hurt her foot while Sister S and the nephews Little A and Little B were visiting this week, she valiantly went to the zoo anyway and walked all over the place that same day. She said, only partially tongue-in-cheek, that if Jim could do the race with 25 stitches, she could certainly handle the zoo on her "sprained" foot. Of course, her bravery appeared ever so slightly rash the next day when her entire foot turned purple and swelled up until it resembled a large eggplant with terrifying sausage-like toes protruding from it. I am ashamed to admit that I asked her if I could throw a dishtowel over it so that I wouldn't have bad dreams about it later. We finally convinced her to go to Urgent Care, which led to an X-ray and the discovery of the snapped fifth metatarsal on which she had inadvertently wandered around for several hours looking at the snow monkeys and the dolphin show and whatnot. She's hobbling around much more efficiently now with the assistance of her crutches, and I keep trying to get her to look on the bright side, which is that she would make an outstanding superhero called something like "El Crutcho" if she could figure out how to swat people in a really stupendous fashion. So far, she has not taken me up on it. So thanks, Jim. My mother never would have ignored her medical emergency without you. Anyway, Marsha interviews that she and her dad want to finish the leg as quickly as possible so that "these healthy, fast teams will be rather embarrassed that a couple gimps beat 'em." That's exactly what I suspect Mom was thinking when she passed those three irritating twelve-year-old boys on the way past the tiger enclosure.

Linda and Karen are driving into Montevideo. They find the disco, apparently the first to do so. Inside the Shake Mega Disco, it sort of looks like that episode of The Brady Bunch where Bobby was the safety monitor and wound up filling the laundry room with suds, only here, it's on purpose. (It's too bad that The Brady Bunch never spawned an Amazing Race team, because I think "Greg and Marcia: Brother and Sister/Dating" would be the best caption ever.) There are indeed crowds of folks on the dance floor, wiggling around in all the soap. Linda and Karen search for an inflatable globe. I love how Karen has a wad of foam on her head that looks almost like a smart, jauntily-cocked hat. I hope that all her friends and relations will be telling her for many years that whatever she's wearing would look even better if she added the soap hat. Eighty-year-old Karen: "How do I look?" Fifty-year-old Karen's Kid: "Good, Mom. But, hmm, the ensemble needs something...what would it be? Oh, right, the SOAP HAT!" And then they'd laugh. Anyway, outside, Alison and Donny pull up. They make their way inside as we watch Linda pop a globe. "Karen, I found it!" she screeches. The moms read the clue, which tells them to take the public ferry to Buenos Aires, Argentina. Phil explains that this will require a drive of about 100 miles to Colonia del Sacramento, and then the boarding of the ferry. Donny and Alison quickly find their clue also. A friendly man helps them find their way to Route 1, which is the road to the ferry, it appears.

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Amazing Race




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