Amazing Race
It Doesn't Say Anything About First Come, First Served. And We're Bigger.

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 1 USERS: A+
We Open in Venice

Elsewhere, accompanied by the Mellow Jazz Sax of Taking It Easy, AirSteve and Dave are meandering around Venice. AirSteve explains that they're both suffering from bad knees and need a rest. "We can't keep up with these young studs," he chuckles. "We're looking for the Fast Forward now." Phil explains the concept of the Fast Forward and the Zenlike study of "when it's most advantageous to go for it." He then informs us that, in this Fast Forward, the teams have to find a traveling pack of street performers and participate with them in a traditional Commedia dell'Arte performance. While the skit is going on, someone will eventually give them the Fast Forward. ["I feel that teams should have been warned that their participation in this Fast Forward would be the gayest thing they would ever do in their lives -- yes, even you, Reichen and Chip." -- Wing Chun] Dave and AirSteve find the bridge and the troupe of players fairly quickly, and are immediately brought into a skit in which AirSteve is operated on and anesthetized via a mallet on the head. "The Miracle of Managed Care," I believe the skit is called. As Dave explains the plot (which is better constructed than many recent episodes of ER, I might add), the doctor starts pulling out AirSteve's intestines, and all his body parts start coming out with the intestines. "His heart was attached to it -- which, I was surprised, I didn't think he had one. His brain was attached to it -- had never been used." Yeah, it's a little bit Catskills, but what are you gonna do? At the very end of AirSteve's prop intestines, the Fast Forward appears. Everyone bows, and Steve and Dave read the clue directing them to the next pit stop, which is on a flagged boat docked at the edge of a lagoon in Venice.

Back at the Palazzo da Mosto, an interesting thing has occurred. Because there was such a long period of time between their arrival at the Palazzo and the operating hours, many of the teams have wandered off to do some sightseeing, while others have camped out by the door, forming a line to enter. Chip and Reichen, in particular, are wedged up against the door, wrapped in their space blankets. Aw, they look just like a couple of little microwave burritos. Josh talks about how disappointed he was to return to the Palazzo and realize that other people were waiting in line. Why they didn't realize that this would happen, I'm not sure. Unlike a train station, it makes perfect sense at a regular route marker to nab yourself a place in line, because order of admittance may very well matter a great deal. Similarly, Al and ClownJon are off balancing things on their faces instead of waiting in line, so when they get back, they have to do Crying Clowns for us to show how sad they are to be near the back of the line. Honestly, it's enough to make me cry myself, between Crying Clowns and the face-balancing. ["I'm surprised they didn't go for the Fast Forward in this leg; all that annoying mugging would have been right up their annoying alley." -- Wing Chun]

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Amazing Race




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