Amazing Race
I'm Not His Wife — He Doesn't Need To Scream At Me

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
A Few Leaders And A Bunch Of Oslo-Rans

Hayden and Aaron? Oh, they're still lost. Not only that, but they're starting to argue about it, making them one of those couples that doesn't yell when things are going well, at least, but does fight when things go badly. In other news of struggle, Meredith and Maria are asking how far away from the ski jump they are, and are being told that it's about 60 kilometers. This might seem like bad news, but the fact that they manage to get the car moving again overwhelms any possible bad feelings about the remaining distance they have to close. "You're doing a really good job; you are," Meredith encourages.

Now, Spazpants stops to ask for some directions. As Jonathan leans into a car to chat with someone, Victoria runs over to him, offering him a pen to write down what the guy is learning. Jonathan says he's trying to remember, but she comes close up behind him and hassles that he has yet to write down a thing, and he reaches out with his arm and shoves her. Yeah, verbal fighting is one thing, but I don't want to watch shoving for very long. Victoria, however, barely reacts, just retreating to the car while continuing to remind Jonathan that he's not going to remember the directions if he doesn't write them down. When he returns to the car, Victoria tells him again that he won't remember, and he assures her that he will. "This is what you wrote down?" she says, looking at some apparently summary notes he took. "I mean, come on." Whatever their vibe is, it certainly doesn't make her cowed, so that's...good, I guess?

Bolo and Lori are driving. She doesn't like the vague nature of Bolo's directions, and he leans into the front seat to show her the map that it looks like they got with their clue, which indeed is a highly unhelpful depiction that looks like it could only end at a buried time capsule or a box of baseball cards. I strongly suspect that map was originally drawn in crayon. Don and MJ aren't doing well with the map either, unless they're supposed to be driving through weeds, which I (and they) kind of suspect they aren't. "This is obviously not right," Don says.

Spazpants arrives at the Viking Village. As he goes to close the trunk of the car, Jonathan hits Victoria on the head. Now, if you've ever been beaned on the head with a trunk lid, you know that that shit hurts. A lot. Creepily, he doesn't even flinch at doing this -- doesn't show that instinctive jump of concern that normal people experience when they feel something they're moving hit somebody else and cause them pain, even accidentally. Victoria clutches her head and gasps in pain, but Jonathan doesn't even appear to notice, which was very, very unsettling to me. ["Me too. When your spouse doesn't at least apologize for injuring you, he needs to not be your spouse anymore." -- Wing Chun] When they get to the clue box, Jonathan takes out his clue, raises his arms over his head, and shrieks. "YEEEAAAHH!" Up under the shelter, Lena chuckles involuntarily, because...what else can you do? I suspect that's how I'd react.

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Amazing Race




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