Amazing Race
I'm Not A Miner! No, You're An Idiot!, Part II

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
Dorks on Golf

As Danny and Oswald look for BridgeClimb, Ozzie voices over that after they left Thailand, he and Danny decided that although they've been having a wonderful time on the race and focusing on enjoying it more than anything else, they've now decided to "add an element of competitiveness." He says it casually, like he would say "add a pair of fabulous sunglasses" if he were discussing an outfit. "Before, we didn't really race that much," he says. So, to review: they made the top five, they're currently in first place, and they've really just been trying to have fun. Kinda rips a gaping, yawning maw in the whole "good racing requires desperate intensity and a sour, clipped, ungracious attitude" theory that so many teams embrace, doesn't it?

9:10 PM. Boston. They read the clue for BridgeClimb, but they tell us immediately that they're not doing it -- they're going for the Fast Forward. Their theory is that Danny and Oswald have used their FF already, so if Boston can snag it, they'll wind up well ahead of the pack. In other words, they're using it purely as a lead-building strategy, as opposed to using it for crisis management. It's not a bad idea, but there are four legs left, and with the almost pathological bunching that's been the rule this season, I doubt it will work. I guess if they don't need it to bail them out, they might as well take it to give themselves a rest, but the unbunchable lead will, I suspect, continue to evade them. Now you can probably sit back and watch me be wrong, of course, especially since we're talking about Boston, whose entire function is apparently to throw me into fits of internal conflict.

Welcome to Phil's Phast Phorward Phacts. One per leg, one per team, blah dee blah. "Most advantageous to go for it." As Phil explains it, this particular leg's FF is probably just about the easiest ever, as it involves locating a well-known diner with all kinds of obvious signage, and eating a meat pie. The meat pie doesn't look particularly appetizing, but finding it looks to be about as difficult as finding your local Burger King. Boy, the hike in the first episode of season one was universally described as extremely punishing, and Xerox had to beat a bunch of Brazilians at beach volleyball, and now Boston just has to drive up and eat? Hmph. I suppose Danny only had to take his pants off and jump in a pool, so perhaps it's on par with that. Anyway, they hop in a cab, and they're on their way. I hope they're hungry.

At BridgeClimb, Oswald and Danny sign up for the first time slot in the morning. "Five forty-five...," Danny says as he signs the card. "Oswald and Danny," Oswald finishes proudly. Hee. This is so strange -- Oswald was so close to running dry in Thailand, and now he appears to be having a better time than anyone. They head for a hotel for the night, which makes me wonder whether they're running out of money. They've got to be cash-poor, don't they? By the way, if there's a next season, I want tighter budgeting in addition to less bunching.

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Amazing Race




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