Amazing Race
I'm Not A Miner! No, You're An Idiot!, Part II

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Dorks on Golf

The Teeth are a bit lost. "I don't want to make a fatal error," Blake intones gravely. Thank you, Blake, for practically providing your own melodramatic Phil-over.

It appears that Gary and Dave have indeed made up some time on Tara and Wil, because the teams pass each other going in opposite directions as Tara and the Weasel leave the Big Winch and Gary and Dave approach. The Teeth make it to the Detour next, and they're all over the golf. Their explanation is that "if anything would make [their] dad happy, it would be to see [them] play golf." Really? They've run around Thailand, they've hang-glided, they've washed an elephant, they've toured a South African township...and what their dad really would like to see them do is play golf? All righty, then.

Thunk finds the metal tree. Gary says he doesn't know anything about playing golf, so Dave grabs the mining stuff. "Mines," he says simply.

Here's Boston, pulling up to the pit stop. They follow a marked series of flags, and after the departure of a large and ominous bird that may or may not be fantasizing about picking clean their musclebound carcasses, they make it to the mat. Not only do they get smeared with war paint and congratulated on being in first place, they learn that by winning the leg, they've won a vacation to Cancun, courtesy of American Airlines, the Official Airline of Everything Pretty, Shiny, and Doggone Functional.

Danny and Oswald, with Oswald already in his mining jumpsuit and hard hat, find the flag to enter the mine. "I look so cool in this, it's not even funny," Ozzie says. "Definitely an adventure," Danny says as they pack him into what is presumably a pretty damn hot suit and pair of gloves. Oswald descends into the mine first, and as Danny comes down the ladder, Oswald calls out to him. "Hello, miner boy!" Then, he adds, "They're meant to dress us up like the Village People everywhere we go." Hee! Now they have to navigate the mine and find the pile of dirt and the shovels.

In the Taraweasel SUV, Wil wonders whether the golf might be easier, but as Tara correctly points out, they don't really want to change direction now. Back at the mine, Cha-Cha-Cha wanders down a series of tunnels, looking for the dirt pile. Eek! Tara and Wil are just outside, suiting up and heading down into the hole. As Tara gets cinched into a piece of safety equipment, she yowls in discomfort, and comments that perhaps she won't be having any kids after all. Down in the mine, Danny and Oswald appear to be going in circles. Oh, noooo!

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Amazing Race

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