Amazing Race
If I Were In Town, I Would Ask For Your Number

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | 2 USERS: A+
Knight Of The Sausages

When the driver with Eric and Pink and Team Guido isn't able to get any information about where the bakery is, they start to worry. Tense! Tense! What will happen?

Back from commercials. Team Guido and Eric and Pink are frustrated enough about not finding the bagels that they decide to switch and find the sausages. They find a guy who says, "Go somewheres there." Which is my favorite set of directions that has ever been provided to a racing team, I think. I'm going to start saying "Go somewheres there" whenever people ask me by email how to get on this show, which happens surprisingly frequently.

The Ladies' Foursome turns in their sausages that they've made, and they sit down to eat. Mirna would like to "say a quick prayer." Dustin, not wanting to sit through a lengthy recitation of dead relatives, takes charge of the prayer, coming up with a quick and efficient "we thank you for this food" kind of prayer, more like grace. My favorite part is where she prays for the sausage to taste great. And, I'm sure, be less filling. Who says religion can't settle age-old questions? And then they are each brought a plate with two feet of sausage on it. "It's so much bigger than I ever thought!" Mirna despairs. And you're kind of going to have to not plan on commenting upon every sausage double entendre that comes to mind, or we'll never get out of here, seriously. You're just going to have to watch these (at the moment) women talking amongst themselves about how hard it is to choke down these big, giant, powerful sausages, and you're going to have to remain dignified. They all start eating. Dustin mentions that at least the other teams aren't here, which is the cue, of course, for the other teams to arrive outside. "How's the sausage?" Eric asks. "Tastes like poop!" Mirna insists, and once again, she's in her feisty-old-lady mode. The women all push themselves to eat faster. As she waits, Pink comments that she's a bit concerned about getting the sausage down her throat. Mirna, always supportive, quizzes Charla on why she's so slow, and Charla doesn't have much of an answer. Mirna lets out a mighty belch. Like, the kind of belch that makes the room smelly. Dustin and Kandice laugh to each other in a way not designed to make Mirna feel bad, which makes them better people than I am.

The other foursome is prepared to turn in their sausages for inspection. Their sausages pass, so they're ready for the eating phase. So now, everybody's eating. As Mirna orders Charla to concentrate, the BQs voice over that it's kind of amusing to listen to Mirna and Charla "bark at each other."

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Amazing Race




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