Amazing Race
I Told You Less Martinis And More Cardio

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 3 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
When Guido Met Mirna

Charla and Mirna pass Dave and Mary, then Teri and Ian. Teri refers to the girls as "Mirna and Schmirna," which is unfunny because it came from those obnoxious quitters, but it's funny because it means she watches the show, which I appreciate. "Isn't it nice, how we all come with names?" she asks. "Do we have a name?" she asks. For a minute, I almost feel like Ian's eyes bore directly into my soul. But then he says, "I hope we're the Big Kahunas." Motion denied.

On the JVJ shuttle, Jill notes that Copa leaves at 3:30, and American leaves at 3:50. Phil now adds in a voiceover that the teams need to figure out that while Copa leaves 20 minutes earlier, it arrives substantially later. Two hours later, actually, meaning one is probably a direct flight and the other isn't. Ultimately, Jill and John Vito decide that since American is at Concourse A, and Copa isn't until D, they'll hop off at A, which will come first on the shuttle route. It's as good a choice as any. In fact, on the other shuttle, Rob and Amber and Danny and Oswald make the same decision, that they'll get off at the one that comes first. At Concourse A, these three teams basically run smack into each other, and JVJ gets to the counter first, with the other teams just behind. They all learn that the American flight will indeed arrive two hours earlier. So with that good news safely delivered, the booking begins.

Next to pull into the parking lot: Charla and Mirna, actually, followed closely by Teri and the Hat. These teams start trying to catch the shuttle, and they're followed by Dave and Mary. Charla and Mirna share a shuttle with Teri and Ian, and when Ian hears Mirna saying to the shuttle driver in Miami "Amigo, go rapido, rapido," he mutters, "Yeah, yeah, yeah." Ha! Seriously, lady? You're in the United States. The guy probably would understand "we're in a hurry." Why is she busting out the foreign languages before they go anywhere? That seems... even more pointless than what she usually does. Dave and Mary do not make it onto this shuttle, which allows Team Guido to catch up to them. The BQs show up, and Dustin is clearly really depressed that she's only "catching up" to Dave and Mary, as she had them tucked away as people she wasn't going to have to worry about beating. Mary hollers at the shuttle driver, "No, no, no, don't pick up nobody!" So he doesn't. Team Guido gets on a different shuttle, and I have to say, even the embroidered "Team Guido" fleece vests seem so much less offensive when they're mildly ironic. They're joined by Dustin and Kandice. For whatever reason, Bill and Joe aren't thinking quite as sharply as they historically have, and they appear to go to Copa just because it leaves 20 minutes earlier. Elsewhere, Mary is talking to David like he's an idiot, talking about the obvious choice between 3:30 and 3:50. So they're going to Copa also. I'd say she's going to feel bad later, but she probably won't, unfortunately. Ian wants to go to Copa, but Charla and Mirna hop off that shuttle at American. Inside, the cousins run into the other front-running teams, and Oswald tells Mirna that this flight is indeed the faster option.

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Amazing Race

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