Amazing Race
He's A Few Ticks Away From Having A Heart Attack!

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Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
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The program gets a little buggy

Team Who is in their car, driving through the darkness, and Jeff suggests that David make use of the trip meter in order to avoid losing track of where they are and where they're supposed to be. Not a bad idea, for a guy who sometimes seems to have trouble finding his own hair with a compass and a set of blueprints. Elsewhere, Jon isn't happy with Kelly, because he's had to run into a convenience store to get supplementary directions. When he returns to the vehicle, he's exasperated. "My little navigator," he says. She defends her attempts at giving directions, he needles her for being wrong...it's pretty much a typical morning of wacky bickering for them. I suspect that if they were at home, he'd be complaining about the coffee and she'd be hiding the cereal. The Chipsters, on the other hand, say that the directions they got were "perfect," so they're finding the Woolshed with no difficulties at all. "Your navigational abilities are awesome," Chip says. Surprisingly, it also appears that Jeff and David have found the right place. "When we get our momentum, it's tough to stop us," Jeff voices over. Eh. I bet you could stop them with a Rubik's cube. Or a word search. When they pull up to the gate with the big red and yellow flag on it, however, they find a sign indicating that the hours of operation are going to hold them up until 6:00 AM. Kelly and Jon arrive shortly thereafter, and Jon remarks, "Looks like we're sleepin' in the Mercedes." Indeed. Kelly voices over that this left about four hours to kill, and just then, we see the Chipsters pull up. "And here's everybody," Reichen remarks. We get a lovely shot of the big "Australian Woolshed" billboard, complete with cartoons of a sheep, a koala, a kangaroo, and what I can only assume is supposed to be a dingo, because it appears that this place is all about reinforcing the Weekly Reader version of Australia. I can only wonder where the cartoon boomerang is, and why there's no loud prerecorded version of "Waltzing Matilda" blaring from a loudspeaker. The same sign also mentions some kind of a dance on February 15. Ah, yes. That would be the dance where you try to convince the gods to make it rain cash-toting tourists.

The sun rises the next morning, and Chip has himself a little stretch by his car. Kelly emerges at the same time. "Good morning, Chipper...are we feeling chipper?" she asks. Jon explains that Chip at this point offered a little speech about his past in Connecticut and how he knows all about sheep farms. "It's just fun between Chip and Reichen and us," Kelly interviews. "It's just fun to push their buttons and get them all riled up, 'cause they take it seriously." Back at the gate, Jon decides to share his own wool expertise with Chip: "And I...own a lot of wool sweaters. So I'm quite familiar with wool." Hee. Chip explains in an interview that he thinks Jon's strategy is to distract him by being annoying. He's very perceptive, Chip is. Reichen adds that indeed, when they're racing, he and Chip are all about being in Show Mode. Kelly now points out in her interview that in fact, the Chipsters won't even wave to her during the race. My sense is that if you heard this quote with more context, she's contrasting this with their behavior during the pit stops, which sounds like it's probably friendly. Being a person who sometimes cannot resist poking at people who are in Super-Serious Intensity Mode, I'm a little sympathetic, I admit. Angry people confronted with silliness are funnier than you'd think. Except cops. Don't try it with cops. Anyway, you can also see Chip doing a quadriceps stretch here, which I would point out is exactly how a guy gets himself mocked by his peers. I bet he does lunges, too. Add some deep knee bends, and I'd be making fun of him, too.

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Amazing Race

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