Amazing Race

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M. Giant: A- | 1 USERS: A+
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The Squid and the Fail

Jen finds the entrance to the U-Turn, "Right. Where. We were." The U-Turn does not thrill them, and they even call the note "so annoying." I suppose they already knew they could outrun Team Family Law after doing it in Guilin. Off to the restaurant they go. They set their gnome down in its waiting seat and start taking orders. Obviously they have to do it phonetically. And with lots of requests for people to repeat themselves. Have the people been sitting in this restaurant the whole time? I hope they at least got something to eat.

Jaime and Cara are sent back the way they came. "We're obviously missing something," Jaime says. That's the kind of incisive analysis that has gotten them this far.

Margie crunches her way through the road block, pausing for a drink and a shudder. Luke? Laughs. Although he might be laughing at her makeup. "Who was the ham-fisted moron who did your eyebrows?" he might be signing for all I know.

After taking the orders, Jen says, "All righty, here goes nothing," and leads Kisha back to the kitchen. And here's the best part of the whole episode, if not the whole season. Whereas one of the diners ordered "Fried Chicken" in Mandarin, whatever the sisters wrote down and repeat to the chef comes out as the Mandarin phrase for Monthly Use Taiwanese Chicken." One can't help but wonder if "monthly use" is some kind of network-imposed euphemistic translation of "tampon," in which case, mmm-MM! The uniformed waiters standing nearby display admirable poker faces. "Vegetarian Noodles" becomes "Good Western Heads Lack Fish." They certainly do in my experience. The sisters get gonged, of course, and return to the table. After making one guy repeat "Golden Pork Spare Ribs" twice, Jen shakes her head and says, "We black, not Chinese."

Jaime and Cara? Still lost.

Margie cracks open her starfish and gives Luke a whiff. "Smells good," he lies.

For Kisha and Jen's second attempt, they relay "New Taste Beef" as "Oil Comes Again to Please the Mouth." Gong! The lady who ordered "Good Luck Fish" is getting "Good Doll Basket Drum." Hey, they're getting closer! Both phrases have the word for "good" in them. But the poor guy who wants "Golden Pork Spare Ribs" would have to make do with "Light Competition Dishes I've Played Before" if the chef didn't send them back for another try. The waiters are losing their poker faces, possibly at the idea of someone who ordered pork spare ribs getting a diet dish instead.

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Amazing Race

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