Amazing Race
Five Continents, 25 Cities, and More Than 40,000 Miles

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Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
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Uchenna and Joyce walk up to a whole line of people waiting to leave on a trip, and sort of get their begging off to a bad start, to my eye, by announcing grandly to an entire group that they're begging. I think addressing a group isn't the right move, because it gives everyone cover. Although he offers to do tricks and such, he's sort of making this more of a grand thing than it needs to be -- I'd say begging should be a one-on-one request for a favor more than this big show, you know? They appear to have no luck. One guy goes so far as to say he's "not into it." Heh. They walk away, and Joyce starts crying, which is where they start to lose me. It doesn't look like they've been trying for that long, and as much as I like this team, they also have a slight tendency toward self-pity that's sort of coming into full bloom right here. It's an absurd situation, and I'm sure it's embarrassing, but this is the game you signed up for, and nobody is kicking your dog, so I'm not sure this sort of attitude is going to help very much, and I always hate it when the woman on a man-woman team cries to the point of uselessness and makes the guy come and prop her up. Anyway, he tells her not to cry. I agree.

Commercials. That gnome...God. That gnome must go.

Later, at the airport, instead of working on getting money, Uchenna and Joyce are sitting around with her crying and him comforting her. Sigh.

Rob and Amber and Ron and Kelly are chopping. Amber notes that her eyes are really taking a beating. Ron appears to be doing a honkload more onions than Kelly, that's for sure. "Martha Stewart, look out," Kelly says, apparently envious of life in prison.

Uchenna begs. Joyce mopes. A couple of women they meet in the airport give them some money. Outside, they find a taxi that will take them for 40 dollars to the Onion Shack. I'm certainly ready for the begging segments to end as soon as humanly possible, speaking solely for myself.

And at the Onion Shack, Rob is commenting that his back hurts from all the chopping. "Who says cookin' wasn't hard work?" he wonders. Well, no one, dude. At least no one smart. They empty their last onions into the pot and get their clue. As Phil explains, the clue tells them to go 60 miles to Rose Hall, a resort where they'll find further instructions. Rob and Amber take off in their cab. Ron, meanwhile, looks up from chopping long enough to insist to Kelly that Rob has "fear in his eyes." Looks like Rob's usual intense cockiness to me, but that's just me. Ron has the Eye of the Tiger! Well, maybe not the tiger. The beagle? Could be. Anyway, Ron mutters some shit-talk (for which, again, he would totally excoriate Rob if the situation was reversed) about how "maybe Rob's an idiot" and isn't afraid of them, blah blah. He and Kelly finish their onions at last. They read the clue and head off in a taxi.

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Amazing Race

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