Amazing Race
Divide And Conquer

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 3 USERS: A
I hate Paris in the springtime...

Lenny and Karyn are museum-hunting. Pat and Brenda are asking around. Loud Pushy Frank is inquiring loudly. Joe practically jumps into somebody's car. Back off, Joe!

Loud Pushy Frank says he's "going to punch [Margarita] in the top of the head" for saying she'd seen a sign for the museum. She's trying to explain that she hadn't meant to commit the entire group to an hours-long hunt for said sign, but the LPFrank ego is not hearing it. "You're lying," he says flatly. "You told everybody you saw a Songwe Museum sign." "I said I THOUGHT I did," she clarifies. Bitterly, she adds, "Thanks for your support, Frank, by the way." A flock of birds flies over and drops a pile of leaves on Margarita's head, and on each leaf is a letter of the alphabet. Margarita fails to notice that they spell "GET A DIVORCE. MARGARITA, THIS MEANS YOU."

Meanwhile, rest of the alliance, lost and confused, is wasting away again in Margarita-ville.

Okay, look. I made the joke. That's the bad news. The good news is that now that I've made it, I'm really very unlikely to make it again. Honestly, what are the odds? I mean, first of all, there are only so many episodes of this show, and second of all, I do have some compassion and love in my heart for all of you. So probably, that joke isn't coming up again. Look on the bright side.

Aaaanyway. Just as I get this recap back on track, Margarita gets the group back on track by suggesting that perhaps driving miles and miles and miles out of town wasn't such a good idea when looking for a museum with (have I mentioned?) the SAME. NAME. AS. The VILLAGE. I swear, these people must stand in front of the mirror with dental floss, hunting for their teeth. After doubling back to square one, they do stumble onto the museum at last. Joe (or Bill) tells us that it's "just an open-air building" where he "saw a skull." What a coincidence. That's exactly the lack of enthusiasm with which I often react to museums myself, unless they have buttons I can push or big dinosaur bones I can pick up and play with. Or big fish. I also like big fish.

Phil voices over that once they hit the museum, the teams have two choices. They can drive to a nearby animal park and take pictures of three hard-to-find animals, or they can drive to a faraway animal park and take a picture of an elephant. They are promised that in the faraway park, elephants are ubiquitous. Cue yellow-filtered camera shots of animals, roaming, calling their agents to inquire about residuals. World's Most Tenuous Alliance decides that they'll go to the nearer park with the harder animals. Fists of Friendship.

Lenny and Karyn are running around with flashlights in what seem to be people's Songwe Village backyards. You know, if they find a guy in his driveway, shirtless and drunk, this will be an episode of COPS.

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Amazing Race




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