Amazing Race
Cheaters Never Win — And They Cheated!

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
Again with the racing

Back to Amanda's Wonderful World Of Do You Kiss Your Mother With That Mouth? "Maybe we fucking need to stop for directions," she says. "We don't know where we're fucking going, we don't know where anybody fucking is..." Hee. She can ride with me the next time I'm trying to escape downtown Minneapolis. Fucking 35W. Fucking one-way streets. ["No way, man. I've got dibs on her for the Lincoln Tunnel approach on Friday at 5:30 PM." -- Sars]

Steve and Dave are in their SUV looking for the airport. "SwissAir, Luftwaffe, and KLM -- which do you think is going to be closest?" Luftwaffe? Snerk. One of them voices over that they do think they'll have an advantage with the flight stuff as a result of being air traffic controllers. "Do you have any idea where you are?" Dave says from the back. "I have no friggin' idea," says AirSteve. Dave looks up and spots a plane, and AirSteve points out that it's "on final for LAX," so they must be getting close. The plane doesn't look to be flying that low, so I'm not sure that hint is too helpful, but they seem pleased.

Monica and Sheree, meanwhile, do not see any airport signs.

Suddenly, a motorcycle cop comes roaring up on the convoy of teams. Chris hypothesizes that perhaps the cop plans to pull over somebody who's speeding ahead of them. Kelly has the same thought as the cop flies by on her left. "Oh my gosh! Woo hoo! Get 'em!" she yells. I do that in the car, too. Monica and Sheree, however, have a different thought. They pull up next to the cop, and Sheree yells to him out the open window, "Where's the airport?" The cop apparently wants to make sure that he understands, so he takes both hands off the motorcycle and does a flapping-wings imitation (to imitate the way the wings flap on a plane, I guess). Good to see the public safety professionals staying on task. Chris is stunned that the cop is giving directions instead of pulling them over. Apparently, the officer agrees to lead Monica and Sheree to the airport, because soon they're off, just following him. Monica interviews that she thinks the other teams will think they're just pampered housewives, but they're not. "We can battle with anyone," she insists. In the SUV, she repeats that they have to get themselves on one of the first two flights.

Drunken cameramen careen around LAX (aw, hi, guys!). Chip then reads some instructions that direct them to put the SUVs in a particular lot, "Park One." Russell and Cindy are doing the same lot-search mambo, and when they need to make a left, they find that there's a big sign that says you can't make a left. They agree to ignore the sign. Man, where's that cop when you need him? They appear to be the first ones to arrive at the lot, park their SUV, and make their way to the airport shuttle. It sounds like Russell just asks the shuttle driver for Lufthansa, taking a sort of "SwissAir, SchmissAir" attitude. Steve and Josh pull in next. When they stop, Josh can see the terminal, so he tells his dad they'll have to walk. When his dad questions him about whether they're really supposed to walk all the way to the terminal, Josh condescendingly snots, "Yes, there's going to be a lot of walking on this trip." Of course, even people not on television shows have to come to LAX for flights, so the odds that they'd make you walk that far and have no other form of transport? Not good, there, genius. They take off running. In the shuttle, meanwhile, Russell orders the driver not to stop for anyone on the way to Lufthansa. He and Cindy high-five and congratulate themselves on how swift they are for being on their way to Lufthansa. Mm-hmm.

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Amazing Race




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