Amazing Race
Bavaria or Bolivia?

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M. Giant: B | Grade It Now!
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Bavarian Creamed

Kerri and Stacy arrive outside at the arena, and Stacy hands it to Kerri. Bopper and Mark arrive, still in last but not by much, and Jamie is getting frustrated enough to display some more creative cursing: "Mother of pearls!" Team Kentucky decides that Mark will do the Roadblock, on account of how Bopper is still almost dead. Soon Kerri and Mark are sliding along with Nary. "We were the first here and everybody's kind of caught up," Jamie confides to us from behind Nary's target. I'm going to throw up." Her frustration is getting cute, though. It's surprising how entertaining it can be to watch frustrated people try not to swear. In fact, it's one of the biggest unexpected benefits to having kids. Meanwhile, Other Rachel and Dave make it to the mat as team number four.At the arena, Mark slides a gnome almost fully into the bull's-eye, so he and Bopper just leapt ahead by two slots and are now headed to the Pit Stop in fifth place. Brendon and Rachel are already there, and while jumping on the mat, Brendon slips and falls flat on his ass, nearly taking out Phil in the process. "Holy manure!" Rachel brays. Still, fifth place is fifth place. And Nary and Kerri are still failing, all the way to the last commercial break.

Coming back. Kerri's on her 69th slide and Nary's on her 180th. Yikes. Even worse for Nary, Kerri is the next to finish, so the cousins both came and went in seventh place. Jamie is trying to keep Nary from blaming herself... for some reason. "It's just us and the gnomes, "Jamie tells us, then calls across the ice to Nary that they can still beat the cousins to the Pit Stop. If it were any other team she was talking about beating, that would sound like cockeyed optimism. But since it's Stacy and the world's worst navigator, Jamie might be onto something. Finally Nary gets one just barely touching the border of the bull's-eye, but the pro nods, either because it's good enough or because he's tired of their faces, so they're finally headed to the Pit Stop in last place. Time for a quick hug before running back to their car.

Kerri and Stacy have stopped another motorist for directions. At least he speaks English. But Nary remembers passing the farm on the way to the arena, so they already know where they're going. As opposed to the cousins, in whose car Kerri asks Stacy, "Was it this right?" Stacy just loses it on her, yelling, "Karri! When someone is giving us directions, could you actually fucking listen to him?" Kerri says she's giving as much as she can give. "You gotta give too!" Stacy doesn't even seem to know to respond to that. As Rachel was once told by a fellow Big Brother contestant, they don't seem to share the same reality.

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Amazing Race

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