Amazing Race
Are There Instructions On Donkey-Handling?

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C+ | 2 USERS: A+
Taking out the trash

El Hornio and Rebecca bicker over their inability to get moving. Apparently, they have chosen donkeys that are stubborn, even for donkeys. Nice one. Hayden, meanwhile, gets directions to the church from a local child.

Lori and Bolo finally finish the mud task, and they receive their donkey clue.

At the donkey pen, Jon hollers gamely, "Who wants to be my donk-aaay?" None of the donkeys answers (fools), so he just picks one. Kris laughs as she tries to keep a donkey in check while passing Rebecca. Kris and Jon take off, and then El Hornio comes by, tapping a donkey lightly on the back as he begs it to keep going. "Don't make me do this the whole way," he says. "Please, I hate hitting you." See, Jonathan? When it's a donkey, it's okay to take that attitude. With wives? Not so much.

Elsewhere, Victoria reaches down for the wood carrier and screams. No, really -- screams. "AAAAAHHH!" Jonathan looks over with only mild interest. She runs over to some locals, who wash her hand off for her. Apparently, she, too, got some kind of a cut or a splinter from the mud carrier. "I don't know what's wrong with her!" Jonathan hollers as Victoria continues to scream. "Jonathan, help her!" Kendra shrieks as Jonathan stands, inert. Victoria continues to put on quite a display of misery.

Commercials. I can't believe they found a movie I want to watch less than a movie where Dakota Fanning is sweet. But they did.

When we return, Victoria is still whimpering. Much to her credit, Kendra yells at Jonathan, "She's screaming in pain! Help her, you asshole!" Hee, awesome. But Victoria decides to soldier on, and she sobs, "I'm not going to get eliminated because my fingers hurt!" So she returns to the mud. "I don't know what's wrong, babe," Jonathan says wearily. "He didn't even help her!" Kendra says, still shocked as she throws more mud at the wall. "Mind over matter," Jonathan says to his wife "supportively." Victoria may not want to be eliminated over this, but that doesn't mean she's through shrieking and screaming, because she is keeping it up quite persistently. Seriously, he is awful, obviously, but she is also a complete spaz, because this silliness like she's being murdered is not necessary. Get help or don't, but don't hang around and keep shrieking, because it's annoying. "Let's go, mind over matter," Jonathan insists, because it was so helpful last time.

Donkey-herding continues. Lori and Bolo pass some children along their way to the donkey pen. "Hello," Bolo says. "Hello," they say back. Aw. And then Spazpants gets their clue. And you'll notice that Jonathan reads it. "Deliver two donkeys..." They run off, rather frantically as usual. Nuance gets their clue at last, and Kendra frets that they're sure to be yielded, because apparently, the clue gives away that there's a Yield ahead.

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Amazing Race




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